Struggling with emotions - could do with support

[Ilovebolly]

I’ve posted quite a few times about how bad things are between H and I. No affection, no communication, like strangers living in the same house. He’s volatile - sometimes nice, sometimes depressed, sometimes angry. It’s exhausting! Plus I’ve recebtly found out he’s hiding a LOT of money from me.
Anyway, am seeing solicitor in just over a week to see where I stand with kids, house etc. I want to try and hang on a bit longer before telling H I want to separate but I’m finding it so hard. I’m ok during the week but weekends are so hard and I just feel on the verge of tears and sick all the time. I’m scared of what he will say and I think he may fight dirty. I’m really struggling to hold it all together just now although I have to for my kids. And none of my RL friends know exactly where I am at - I’m putting up all the barriers! Anyone else been through similar, or just got some encouraging words?

Hi OP - no wise words I'm afraid, but lots of and (or for lunchtime 5 o'clock).

I can empathise with putting a brave face on, but I'd encourage you to open up to a friend you trust IRL. Having someone who at least knows what's going on (even if they don't know the explicit details or emotions etc) can lighten the load.

Have you tried to better your relationship before considering leaving?

Thank you for the replies. I know I should try to open up to someone in real life, it’s hard!
Of course I’ve tried to improve the relationship...I’m not exactly taking divorcing lightly. What I’ve tokd you here is a very brief snapshot of what is actually going on!

Well then if you are unhappy then leaving is the best option for all. You don't want your children in an unhappy marriage. I know as I took 4 years to leave my husband.

Will be a lot easier if you open up to your family and friends, he does not need to know anything; unless you actually tell someone you will probably do nothing and he sounds absolutely awful.