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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Help - confused

1 reply

fluffykittens1 · 23/09/2018 23:54

So, I was with my partner for just nearly a year..

I have only recently come out of it but can't help but feel as if the relationship breaking down has been my fault.. I still want to go back to him even though I know it's the wrong thing to do.

In our first 3/4 months of the relationship everything was great he would everything for me.. go out of his way for me.. made me feel so important and loved. Until little things started happening.. he would constantly check my phone and go through messages.. check who is following me on social media
Make friends I had, I was unable to speak to them and we couldn't have contact- I also then asked him to do the same with girls.
I was consumed by him, we did everything together all the time.
As time went by I was unable to do more things.. planning too see my friends was planned all around him.. I wasn't able to go out for drinks, as he didn't trust men..
he became very aggressive at certain times in our relationship and would always end things with me.. but then get back together. If I ever tried to end it. I'd be giving up..

Two weeks ago we then again argued and I asked him to leave me be, he turned up at my house asking for his things and his pictures on my phone. Which I asked him for some time to process what has happened and I will give him it all, at this point again being aggressive. So the only thing I thought to do was get in my car and drive away. He spent two days following me harassing me I couldn't go home. When this calmed we spoke again..

we have now come to an end and he has told me he doesn't love me or care about me anymore .. however he waits for me to message him or make an effort with him.

I still want to be with him, but I also know I shouldn't. It kills me inside to think he doesn't love me after a year.. I just don't know what to do or how to feel.

OP posts:
PlaidPjamas · 23/09/2018 23:59

Nope, I mean if you check out my thread you'll see I have shit boundaries but even I on this one see clear as day you are describing an abusive man who will get worse and worse.

Ignore the feelings of missing him, you were absolutely right to end it DO NOT GO BACK.

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