We’ve been married for 15 years and have two teenagers both with ASD. The last few years have been especially difficult with them and have left us both exhausted. DH has long term depression and has tried a lot of different types of medication and CBT but nothing has ever really worked. He’s currently on a high dose of drug which has removed his sex drive entirely but hasn’t made him any less miserable. I sometimes feel that he gets satisfaction out of nothing having helped his depression (I know this sounds incredibly unfair but I think he’s convinced nothing will help no matter what it is.).
He won’t socialise with me as he can’t drink and doesn’t see the point in going out, I don’t drink either but have a social life that I enjoy and friends I see. He doesn’t mind any of this.
I know it’s blindingly obvious I should leave but the kids are so intense and over analyse everything. They rely on both of us and their routine being the same, one of them also has had horrendous mental health issues which are ongoing. Us separating would make their lives so much more difficult but I don’t know what to do. I feel like a black cloud appears when DH comes into a room. If anyone else is in a similar situation how do you cope? Our house isn’t big enough for us to have separate rooms.