Stressed, tired and fed up. I need a hug.

[Sweetmummy77]

Ok so here goes.

Was in the early days of what could have been a new relationship. The guy went a little odd on me to say the least. He told me that he was feeling anxious about things and didn't want to go back to a sad place???? (We also work for the same company)
I backed off massively, with no contact. after a few days he blocked me on whatsapp. (Childish I know) this after a week he has appeared on my whatsapp again. Everyday he comes up to the office with no real reason and stares at me. So i decided as i hot desk to move to an area he would not go to. My reason is I need space from all of this as it is getting to me. A manager witnessed his strangeness and felt he was almost jealous towards me talking to him. Which backed I was making the right choice.

I was settling into my new area today and next thing I know the guy in question appears. No reason to be in this office at all. Doesn't talk to me but makes his presence known. I just really don't get him. He wanted space I have given it to him. I need time to find myself and space to get over all of this. I did think the world of him but he hurt me. I need space away from the games as i really dont understand him. My confidence is quite low at the moment and I doubt my own judgement.

I would explain the situation to your manager (although that’s an odd comment to say he/she seemed jealous... was that the manager being jealous or the “ex”?) Your manager should be able to quietly warn him off and remind him of the consequences of making your working life intolerable.

If the hovering / stalking doesn’t stop after that, you should involve HR. TBH, your manager will probably let them know of your conversation anyway (or should if he/she is sensible) so at that point it would hopefully be an escalation and they’ll step in to make him behave like an adult.

This isn’t your fault and you are completely not to blame from what you’ve told us, but this kind of stuff is why I’ve never looked for relationships at work. You might find keeping your personal and business lives separate less stressy in the long run.