Ever been so desperate for sex that you do something stupid?

[AVONUT]

I've been single for 3 years. Tried online dating. Not met anyone I liked and none of them liked me. A few months ago I suddenly became obsessed with sex. Could not think about anything else. Could not concentrate at work. So stupidly called a guy I knew was a wrongun. He had tried it on in the past but was in a relationship so I cut him off. This time around I asked he said he was free but in a jokey way. To cut a long story short I slept with him, accidentally unprotected, he has barely contacted me and certain things have pointed to him still being a relationship. I feel so stupid and ashamed. Finding it hard to get on with my day. How do I move on?

Everyone does stupid stuff once in a while. Don’t beat yourself up over it. Block and delete his number so you don’t contact him again; book yourself an STD test; have a laugh or a cry about what an idiot you are with a good friend who will agree that you’re an idiot and then tell you it’s not the end of the world. And if you want a relationship based on sex, look for a hook-up or FWB where everything’s out in the open and you both communicate honestly what you want from each other.

You had sex, you didn't kill someone! Honestly, it's absolutely NO BIG DEAL.

You've done nothing wrong.
Accidentally unprotected, though?

No big deal, having sex with someone in a relationship cos you knew OP, so in my book yeah you did a shitty thing actually. Your reaction is good and healthy, your mind is telling you that was a big mistake, learn from it but don't beat yourself up any more.

Life is for learning. You never lose if you learn. You have learnt from this. Dust yourself off and move on.

Put it down to experience. I have very recently slept with someone that I wish I hadn’t but it’s not the end of the world. we are both single but I was doing it entirely for the wrong reasons, I just wanted sex and validation and to have slept with someone before my divorce so I don’t feel so pathetic. I’m not seeing him again as he seems to really like me and I don’t want to hurt him. I miss his messages but am sitting on my hands because I don’t want to be a douche and use someone just to make myself feel better. Forget it, be strong and move on.

How embarrassing.

Is this the prelude to the ‘oh no I’m pregnant after ONS’ thread?

Not helpful. But thank you to the others for your support.

Don’t worry at all, I’ve definitely had some regretful encounters! Why do you think you’re giving yourself such a hard time about it? He lied to you. Or is it just having a ONS? Don’t feel bad, just maybe avoid no strings sex until you’re in a good place to have it.

Ever been so desperate for sex that you do something stupid? you ask.

Absolutely. Yes. But never unprotected. I also take pains not to have sex with someone who's in a relationship. That would bother me.

But having meaningless sex with a wrongun? Don't beat yourself up so much. Next time use protection.

It's no big deal. Go to the clinic after a couple of weeks and take the morning after pill. Forget about it.

Don't worry about it. If you want casual sex there are websites for that. Always use protection though

Have you considered a vibrator? Or tinder?

Happens to the best op.
Put it behind you. Hope you meet someone nice.