30 Days No Contact

[30DaysNoContact]

I’m currently undergoing the 30 day no contact rule and am currently on day 3 of no contact.

I guess I just need a hand hold. Is anyone going through the same and any positive stories to keep me from wanting to contact my ex please. Any advice is greatly appreciated.

Sympathies. It can be painful, I know.

Top tips:

1. Stay busy. Arrange to meet up with friends, join an exercise class or go to the gym, throw yourself into work.

1. Stay away from social media. Don't google things like: 'If I do 30 days no contact will he want me back.' Try not to wallow.

1. Do not stray from the path. No good will come of it. If you break no contact you will only have to start again with more pain and embarrassment to process. Keep the promises you make to yourself - it is the path back to some pride in yourself.

offers hand to hold

On 26th it will be exactly 30 days...

Had 2 weeks very difficult but now I’m feeling better and not sure if I want anything with him at all.

I have a friend who would check up on me...

Spent time by walking, cinema, and reading. Just sitting in the park and watching people helps.
At the moment you want to contact him because you got used it. It slowly wears down...
I deleted his number, messages, pictures, recent calls. But I remember his number by heart...

Don’t contact him. After 2 weeks it should get better... 🌹

Good luck

Holding your hand.....

I'm coming up to the 2 week mark and it has been so painful. I've had cards from him through the door and post, roses delivered to work. It was my decision to end it and he has been begging for another chance.

Agree with the advice already given about staying busy - I've been going to gym, yoga, meditation, dancing. After the first week I felt for the first time that I could bear just "being" on my own - reading, watching tv etc.

The other thing I'd say is to avoid alcohol - it impairs judgement and may make you cave when you wouldn't have done otherwise.

Be proud of yourself and stay strong! It isn't easy, but you can do it!

IME It gets easier the longer you maintain the NC

Stupid question but who told you that you had to do no contact? I saw a counsellor last week, my husband has moved out but I would like him to try. He is doing his own version of no contact with me, hard as we have a child. The counsellor told me to keep lines of communication open??!

Thanks for the replies, it really helps to hear what other people have gone through.

@Bestlife18 No one told me to do it, I do not have kids so it may be different in your situation.

I know it sounds bad but I googled 'how to get back with my ex' because I know in my situation we both love each other still but he broke up for reasons I believe we can work through. Even if we do not get back together, I shall feel a lot more independent and happy after no contact hopefully.

Wondered if it actually would work for me - it’s difficult because of the kids though....it’s so hard isn’t it

@Bestlife18 It is so difficult, yes, I have low and high points and I haven’t been eating or sleeping properly. It may be worth trying 30 days no contact but with the exception of talking purely about the kids and nothing non related to them?

Yeah I know that feeling. Not eating well and keep waking up at 5 with my stupid husband on my mind! If only we had a magic wand to forget like they seem able to!

Also - I will try this in solidarity with you. Been out with work colleagues who have shown me tonight that I am being big time trifled with so time for a stand to help myself!

@Bestlife18 I’m exactly the same - just woke up now! And then I saw something on social media I didn’t want to see and I probably wont be able to get back to sleep. It’s good you had time out with your work colleagues.

Hi
I’ve not posted before but this thread might just save me!
My 8 year relationship ended just over 2 weeks ago. We’ve been together since my divorce. He has never moved in with me and my kids. He’s 38 and still lives with his parents despite owning many houses himself.
So we’ve had 2 weeks where we meet up, talk, tell each other we love each other etc. He said all the things I’d ever wanted to hear. Then would get cold feet and want “space”. We agreed on a month break.
Then last weekend we were at the same gig. He got very very drunk and ended up dancing with a girl. It killed me to see his hands on her.
So I spent the next day crying and allowing myself to wallow.
I have messaged him but he hasn’t replied.
I know I shouldn’t do it. Everyone tells me to forget him, I can do so much better but I miss him so much. I know it’s like an addiction.
The other problem is he lives opposite me!
I think I need to follow this 30 day rule.
Sorry for the long text. It’s hard when I’m sitting here on my own though.

I am on day 31 of NC not initiated by me I have to say....I have respected all but it is devastating....on the same night received the phone call whilst away visiting for the night a neighbour had bagged up all my clothes.....it was cruel and brutal...without any discussion....I could understand NC if I could understand what has happened....I left that fateful morning with a family including two step children of over 6 years and what I thought was a committed relationship......picking up the pieces tentatively