Ok, I’m not usually this messy. But I could do with some advice on how to sensibly and graciously move on. Very briefly, there is a man at work who I got to know a little out of work. Nothing happened physically, but he was, I think, up for an affair. His marriage was breaking down at the time (no excuse, I know) Anyway, as hard as it was, I turned him down as I knew it would end in a mess. Cut a long story short, he’s now divorced but is having a relationship with another work colleague. We all work close to each other in the same office. It’s been incredibly difficult as I did like him quite a bit and am still very attracted to him, and what I thought might be a quick fling with this woman seems to be an actual relationship. She’s a lot younger than him. He and I have got a lot in common, are similar ages and I think he likes me too, but not in a romantic way.
I’ve tried really hard to accept that nothing’s going to happen, and rationally I know this, but working with him (and her) is very difficult. I don’t want to leave my job but I’ve thought about doing this a lot. I feel like he chose her over me and it’s massivrly dented my confidence tbh.
Outwardly, I appear friendly but detached to them both but I’m struggling really. Any advice, apart from changing jobs?!