Decree absolute - why am I so emotional?

[CallMeHippo]

Serial name changer.

Decree absolute has come through four days ago and since then I have been emotional, teary, physically and mentally exhausted. I didn’t expect to feel all this, is it normal?

Ex walked out two years ago after I discovered OW. When I still tried to process, he started divorcing me for unreasonable behaviour. Made up all sorts of things. It took almost two years for various reasons.

I thought I was doing ok. I’m not completely happy but my life isn’t awful either, but I do feel lonely sometimes. I’ve not dated, not sure why not. But I thought I was doing ok and now I feel dreadful again.

Can someone please give me a kick?

I think getting the DA just reaffirms how final everything is and that the marriage really is over. I’m sure it’s normal to feel all sorts of emotions. Chin up love.

You don't need a kick. You need to be kind to yourself! You have been through hell for the past 2 years and you have every right to feel devastated. The end of a marriage is it's own kind of death, and even if you've been cheated on and are moving forward successfully, getting through the process of divorce is gut wrenching. Feel as sad as you need to and allow yourself the time you need to grieve.

I was the same. Be kind to yourself

Thank you. I struggle to be kind to myself. I’ve been telling myself off the last few days for moping.

No kicking here either. When we marry we dream of the life we hope we will have and how the relationship will be. You’re grieving for that.
Do be kind to yourself. He may have been too much of a tosser to see it but you’re worth that. Wishing you happier days ahead.

It's the funeral for your marriage, OP. It's natural to be upset. He's been so horrible to you, though - please don't be horrible to yourself, too. Treat yourself how you want to be treated.

I think it's normal, my mum and my friend were the same.

It's a big thing.

Be kind to yourself.