Bad day...need a hug or a kick!

[Mum1g2b]

Background - split with fiancé 7 weeks ago, we have a 6 month old together. Decision to split was his and completely out of the blue.

After the first month when I was a mess, I started to feel a bit better, still had moments but sleeping & eating better, getting out a& doing stuff etc. I’ve been doing no contact as far as is practical as we need to communicate for the baby but I’ve been much less focussed on him.

This morning I got a Facebook email suggesting people I might know and there he was. He’d come off Facebook when we were together and has now set up a new account. I couldn’t help myself and I looked. Full of random girls as friends, his exes (including the one he looked up when I was pregnant), pics of him on nights out. Clearly enjoying the single life. Also people who have told me what he did was shameful are friends with him, liking his posts, all just feels really false.

It’s completely thrown me, I’m in tears and feel like I did at the beginning. My head says I’m better off without him, he did some dickish things when we were together and the way he ended it and how he’s behaved since. But my heart still wants what we had when it was good and to be a family.

I know I just need to give myself a kick but it’s so bloody hard at times.

"...people who have told me what he did was shameful are friends with him, liking his posts, all just feels really false"

It IS false. It's pretend facebook land where people write rubbish, pretend their lives are fun and people like posts to be part of the action.

Don't read it anymore. He was one of the crap ones who bolted from responsibility. Let his ex have him and he can keep being a manchild while you be a mum.

You need to block him on social media. People are a bit false at times, but liking his activities on Facebook doesn't mean they're not genuine about thinking he's behaved badly. But they're not likely to ostracise him over it, if they were more his friends than yours or if they're his family. If they're your close friends, you may have a point. But your best course is to block him and not stress over what he's doing now.

Oh op no kick from me. That is a hard thing to see and I know it feels like a slap in the face. It’s perfectly natural to be grieving for what might have been but today is just a tiny blip in your otherwise upwards path to happiness.

Be kind to yotrself. You are doing great

I should have said I did go and block him after I’d looked.

Good, dontvtrad that stuff.

If you feel tempted, come on here and chat instead

Don’t read

Thank you 🙂

Ouch! Not a nice thing to see but use this to push you forward in your life without him. You sound lovely and mature, he, on the other hand, looks like an immature little boy.

You will get through this patch. Ride it out with your head held high x