Is he hiding something?

[Uniquefashion]

My partner seems to be hiding something. He's not wanting kisses or cuddles anymore, says he will have sex but doesn't initiate it. I try a lot but he always rejects me. He's been busy at work recently but never normally is and says that it's this stress that's causing him to not want me. Normally he does nothing for work, sits and plays games at home. When I ask him what's the problem, he just gets annoyed with me. He rejected me again last night and I was upset about it and he told me to go away rather than reassure me that he does love me. Just don't feel loved right now by him. Get it if he's stressed, but he's shut down. I don't believe him that this is all it is.

Well we talked, or rather argued. He's gone back to trying again and being all over me, but I know that in a couple of days he'll stop, so I'm not reciprocating to be honest.

I dunno what it is, but I feel like somethings happened that he isn't telling me about. I don't think he'd cheat though, but don't we all say that?

I am really sorry you are experiencing this, no matter what the reason being rejected is always difficult and leads to all sorts of doubts about the reasons. Is it you, him or the relationship. I doubt anybody handles this well when they experience it. If you have ever been with somebody who has depression it is a real struggle to respond in a way that is constructive when you feel so rejected and stressed yourself. It is hard OP and you have my heartfelt sympathy.

To be honest the explanations for his behaviour are:

1. He is depressed or becoming depressed. This would be apparent in other aspects of his life. Google symptoms of depression. He won't exhibit all, a lack of interest in sex and a lack of emotional feeling are amongst them but there should be others.

1. He is stressed at work. Stress isn't just caused by overwork but also by boredom, being under-utilised, bullied or feeling at risk

1. He is having an affair.

1. He is not having an affair but is checking out.

It could be all of these things in combination or succession (not necessarily experienced in any order).

You have 2 courses of action. The first is to try to constructively talk things through and you might need counselling to help with this. The second is investigate or snoop / watch for other signs of an affair.

Personally I would go with the former and see if he opens up. You stand a chance for repair. The latter is pretty much a path to splitting up.

Either way it would be a good time to assess the state of your ducks and line them up. Be prepared for change financially and emotionally.

Good luck

Thank you for replying.

I think he is depressed but he won't talk to me. I know he is scared about some dentist appointments coming up and I'm getting him some help to relax him for hat, but I dunno what else is wrong. He just won't open up.