Would marriage counseling help or any advice please

[victoriasecret80]

I've been with my husband for 11 years married for 3. We have 2 dc and I'm currently pregnant with number 3. I'm really struggling with communicating with him he never wants to discuss anything that's important and when we do talk I always feel he's half listening. I'm not looking to sit down every night either and discuss our deepest thoughts but just generally couple stuff that pops up every now and then. For example we are not planning on any more children (him more than me is adamant 3 is enough and I'm happy with 3) we both know we need to chat about contraception so we said we'd go off do a little research on long term solutions and come discuss it in a few weeks. This never happened even though I broached the subject he was always too busy/too tired to discuss.
I work 4 days a week and he wants me to reduce my hours again when dc3 comes along. I'm ok about this as long as I'm not part time so he gets to fulfill his hobbies and I'm stuck in the house 24/7 which I fear may happen. Obviously I've no problem doing the lions share of the housework but I want to discuss it with him fully and maybe discuss a plan on where we both have sufficient time to ourselves/hobbies ect and what the other persons expectations are in terms of housework/caring for the children and cooking he basically went off on one saying I'm not wasting two hours discussing this it's pointless. I told him we still need to discuss contraception before I give birth in a few weeks he was like fine Il just use a condom as I'm not going through a lifetime of pain getting the snip. I just wish he'd discuss this with me like an adult instead of getting so hostile about stuff and listen to my point of view too. Sorry for the massive rant

He's a selfish manchild who is unwilling to even discuss things nevermind find a solution to things that works for you both. He's refusing to discuss and shutting you down so that you'll give up trying. Typical manipulation, control and emotional abuse. What's the rest of your relationship like?

I just had to comment on the vasectomy issue. Men in the UK seem terrified of the procedure. That surprised me as the rate of post operative pain in the US is very low - 1% to 2%. There is apparently a page on the NHS website saying that 10% of men experience pain post operatively. I don't know if the NHS has poor data or if the surgical technique here is better, but still it's a much simpler, safer procedure than a tubal ligation.

An overview of the management of post-vasectomy pain syndrome

After our second and last child DH went off and had it without a fuss and was fine three days later.

Rant away, your DH is not being an adult about this. If you can get him to go to counseling do so.

Thank you @PerverseConverse @MissConductUS I haven't got a problem with him deciding not to have a vasectomy I totally understand it's his choice the same way he's respectful of how I don't want to get the pill or have a coil input having read about heavier periods being a side affect and tbh I can't afford to have them any heavier 😫 I just wish we could sit down and be adult about it and even if condoms were the answer least I'd feel it was a joint decision and not one I feel solely dominated by him.