he doesn't sleep with me as much

[blueechalk]

So I've been seeing this older guy roughly 17 years age gap for a year and a half and it all started off as a fling. However we have become closer and a little more serious over the year but he can be really inconsiderate and careless with me. So we're always on and off and I feel like he doesn't want to be seen with me in public so much because of our age gap although we do go out here and there and briefly I'll meet his friends when we're in the car.
But the point is, I'm pregnant and initially he was very distant but now seems positive about it (he has kids of his own from previous relationships but is refused from seeing them) so I can see why he wants another one and is keen to make another start again with a new relationship. But lol the question I'm asking, is that why we don't seem to sleep with each other as often as we used to before. We're very intimate as in we'll cuddle a lot in bed and he seems to behave more affectionate towards me and not just sexually trying to gain something like he mainly did before. Although I have to admit, I know he does want to sleep with me more than once but I prefer to make him initiate lol just for fun so I won't really encourage but I'll just be affectionate back, but anyways he normally persists and we'll end up doing it a lot. Since before the pregnancy and maybe a month before I found out he hasn't been very driven to sleep with me multiple times. Like last night for instance, we only did it once and he just fell asleep after cos he was so tired. I want the intimacy back and I know I should initiate more, but I do try to get him into the mood later on in the night but he's always sleepy. I just wondered what this could possibly mean, I know he's very stressed about me having his baby because no one would approve, especially his parents who don;t even know I exist, well mine don;t know he exists either.

sorry for the long message but I've always been confused about our relationship which was never one to begin with anyway and this reduction in sexual intimacy yet his growing affection confuses me.

If you stay at your mum’s there’s a chance she knows you’re about 20 weeks pregnant or will do soon so I’d just tell her.

There’s an equally good chance that with his history he won’t be allowed unsupervised contact with your baby.

You want to keep him in the picture for the financial support but he's in debt every month and sells drugs on the side? Good God... what a mess. I think it's time to wake up and smell the coffee OP. You're going to become a mother in 20 weeks, this man is 17 years older than you, doesn't see his children he has, has no stability, has stepped back from you because your pregnant and may well be doing this with another 21 year old. You need to start talking to your family because when all is said and done and when that baby is in your arms your friends won't want to know.

I can't help but want him, i just wish he'd step up like he said he would as i'm looking to be homeless very soon, i can't get any benefits. I'm working and technically they won't give anything unless i'm on the streets or on universal credit, can't get housing benefit because i'm house sharing privately and can't even attempt to rent a flat privately unless i can claim housing benefit before. I broke down today at how much of a mess i'm in and i've found nothing to help me. They only give some benefits once you've had the baby.

In my opinion, from what I've read he's had his chance to "step up". He should have stepped up as soon as he found out you were pregnant. What you're seeing is the real him, he won't all of a sudden become the Disney prince you're wanting him to turn into. Have you contacted your family since your post? Have you contacted Women's Aid/Shelter/Citizen's Advice for advice? I think you need to think about how you and your baby will survive without this man (who I suspect unfortunately might be looking for an exit strategy). You have twenty weeks, your situation can be changed.