Let's get happy

[Cheermyselfup]

Hello. I won't get in to my lengthy relationship history but I've spent my whole life pinning all my happiness on a man's, waiting for texts, jumping when they say 'how high?' and ultimately, it hasn't gotten me anywhere. I worked as model when I was in my late teens/early 20s, so I'm considered attractive, yet I'm now single and I can solemnly say that a lot of my friends seem much happier than I am. I don't want to be that person who's so man-focused.

Friends have said things like 'do things for YOU.' I just thought it'd be nice to start a thread about what makes us/you all happy outside of relationships and children.

What do you do to cheer yourself up when you're feeling down? What's your foolproof way of making yourself feel better?
What makes you happy (other than your relationship and children)?

I want to actively work on making myself happier and I want to get in to a better place before I hopefully meet the right man for me.

Music.

I’m passionate about music. I go to gigs of the bands I really love, the shows are usually 60-200 miles away so I either drive for the shorter ones or hop on a coach for the longer ones (usually set off about 10am and then get the 1am overnight coach back home afterwards). I’ve met loads of friends doing it, some of whom have graduated from gig buddies to genuine friendships. It makes me feel alive saying bye to my OH, setting off on my travels and going to do something that genuinely gives me more emotional fulfilment and euphoria than anything else I’ve ever experienced. I usually plan to go alone and if someone else I know is going too we might meet up, but if not I’m happy being on my own. I dunno why, but it just feels like it gives me a fresh perspective on things being away from home surrounded by thousands of people I don’t know, enjoying my own company or chatting to new people depending on what I feel like. Then of course the boost of what the music does for me, the months spent looking forward to each one, being able to check out fun stuff in the city the day of the gig and the memories to always remember.

Are you into anything similar? Music? Art galleries? Museums? Talks? Events?

Books.

Curling up in bed with a book at night is the best part of my day usually. Fiction provides such a wonderful escape for me that nothing in my own life seems to consume me to the same extent after reading a chapter or two.

I dance. Particular the free-form kind. Go to a 5Rhythms session; join a class; go to a nightclub; find an all-night illegal wilderness rave and dance like a wild thing on MDMA. All of these float my boat, but pick what does it for you. Dance is great for practicing being in your body and expressing anxieties and insecurities and just re-energising.

I also do things completely outside of my comfort zone. I don’t have many inhibitions but I think to challenge myself over the ones I do have. I generally end up smiling all the way through at the ridiculousness of it and it either being a great experience or a great story to tell.

In short - do stuff which doesn’t require others’ approval - just your own body and mind.

I read.
I adore music too, but the kind of music I listen to is more, erm... dramatic than happy!
My friend bakes and cooks, which is really nice because she always wants to give away what she's made... if that's your thing, your friends will love you for it

Sports. Friends. Movies

Wine

Music, books, cats.

My dog. She makes me laugh!

I play sports, badminton or golf! All at amateur level but taking 2 hours to be "loveisland" again instead of mummy reminds me I'm still my own person! Or a spa day with a nice magazine

tap dance

taking time to eat well

regular daily walk, ideally with company but not necessarily

yoga mostly once its over but i feel great afterwards

occasional massages

Having lots of things (that I really enjoy) planned, say for a Saturday, and at the last minute not doing any of them, spontaneously doing something else