Hi all,
I was hoping for some advice as I am currently in a tricky situation. My mum died when I was 15 before my GCSES from lung cancer, i didnt really ever think she would die but that was naive looking back. She was very poorly and got diagnosed just before christmas, passing away in April.
My parents were together and since her death my dad has not been considerate, he had another women stay at our house a month later and then kicked me out for being upset over it. There has been numerous things since her death and I have had to leave home a few times to stay with my godmother.
He has had a new girlfriend for two years and she lives in our house, We were never properly introduced so it was very awkward and uncomfortable. My dad decided he wants to sell the house to buy a house with just her and give me a small ammount of money from the sale as a deposit for a house, i asked him to wait until next year as i will then get inheritance from my grandad (My mums dad) that would make it much easier for me to move. I have just turned 20 and work full time but it would be impossible for me to buy in my area at this point.
The thing that upsets me the most is that my dad went bankrupt before my mums death, my mum and both of her parents died within a year leaving my mum inheritance that went to my dad. We wouldnt have a house if any of them didnt die.
To try and keep it short my dad went crazy and kicked me out again for suggesting he wait until next year to sell, he threatened to punch my god mum grabbed me and it was pretty scary, i called an ambulance and he went to hospital that night and had therapy after.
This was in June, he has since sold the house and it only took a week to sell as he took the first offer.
I am now going to rent for 6 months from a holiday cottage company as I have two dogs so private wouldnt touch us, we live in an area that renting and properties are so desriable that everything is no pets etc as there is such a high demand. This is going to cost me £1200 PM + Bills for a very small two bed with a courtyard for the dogs.
My dad does not yet know that I am going to move as he hasnt asked me what im doing, we dont speak. I have had to block his number as he texted me lots of abuse about my mum and how she never loved him and keeps saying that I need to get over her death. I am struggling at the moment as I just miss her so much, she will miss every milestone in my life and that breaks my heart. She was an amazing woman who would do anything for anyone and I just miss her so much.
I talk to my god mum but I dont have any other family left except my dad who will just ignore me at home. I am so sad about my family house selling as I have always lived here and have every memory of my mum here too.
I feel as if I am selfish by leaving and not telling them but he is making me homeless and I dont think I want him to have my new address. I was hoping for some tips if anyone has ever had a similar situation or if you would have any advice for your own daughters if it ever happened to them.
I am so sorry for the rant, I am not sure what I am hoping to achieve but I am just struggling with it at the moment. My Dad makes me feel stupid for missing my mum and I just dont no where to go from that.
Thank you very much for reading and I apologise for the length. I have tried to summarise but its tricky because it has been going on for four years so there is a lot more than this but it would be great to hear your thoughts as I do currently want to cut my dad out of my life.