I have known my girlfriend for 10 years and we were absolutely so in love but there were always obstacles and we separated quite regularly I always promised that I would put them first she had at the time a two-year-old son who is now 12 , I guess thinking about it now I always promised I could change and then before you know it was in the same place arguing about same problems, ( just to point out I was suffering depression and got addicted to sleeping tablets which caused no end of problems but she was always trying to fix me she stuck with me so long , ) which brings me to the present time or about a year ago we had separated and I was approaching my 46 birthday and I thought to myself I really do love this woman I’m going to actually get the help that I need so I can give this woman the unconditional love that she always gave me. During that time we was apart she started dating somebody but rightly or wrongly we were still messaging occasionally then she told me that she was with somebody who was her complete opposite he had been to jail for drug smuggling was a drinker drugs was very controlling very jealous anyway to cut a long story short she threw him out I know it was very sudden but we got back together when she threw him out during that time he would constantly harass her drunken calls text even though she blocked him he will get a new phone. I let her do it her way but I sensed she was finding it difficult to let him go and he was wearing her down but at the same time she was telling me how much she loved me and how proud she was of me that I changed , ( I was ready to love her and put her first ) she told how bad it’s been for her with him . You know what’s coming she dumped me and went back to him a control freak a narcissist within two weeks she told me she had him arrested on seven charges of intimidation broken property as 5 other charges her and her 11-year-old son were locked in her bedroom frightened of what he was going to do . He was sentenced to 6 months in prison and you guessed it we got back together and we was planning a future together we were even going to move and get a property together . She had a restraining order against him so we couldn’t come into the borough I was confident we were going to live happily ever after and grow old together. Six months past and out of the blue she said to me do you think we’ve just become friends via text message that was the last I heard from her as she blocked me on everything I was in shock as we wasn’t living together I had my own place as she did I took the stance of how could she do that to me again but I was devastated that wasn’t a day that I didn’t think about her what she was doing who with then I was driving through a local town centre and I saw her with a man and I messaged her and said I’ve just seen you you don’t look very happy she ignored me for two weeks and then replied her sparkle has gone she’s not happy I going to cut a long story short I got a message two weeks later to say as from today she is single it’s all kicked off and he is now out again I was solo and I missed it so much but I offered to take her to work to meet up for breakfast and she told me she was getting messages and voicemails at this time I didn’t week but a few days afterwards she messaged me to say it is the man who she had arrested. I didn’t judge her because I know what he was like a narcissist he’s got nothing without her and she provides everything for him , so she stayed round my flat that weekend , And I looked after her as she was diagnosed with skin cancer during the last time with him and she is due for an operation middle of September it’s very early stages and it looks like things are going to be okay ,She also told me she was suffering with migraines so I just looked after her I declared my love her and she did to me she was embarrassed that she took in back the second time especially after him being arrested, I thought this is it we’re going to be together you guessed it after about a week I called her one night and she said to me she’s feeling stressed she needs time to clear ahead I said okay that’s fine it was out of the blue but I respected her decision I left it until the morning and tried to call again to which I found she had blocked me and it went straight to voicemail I knew I could message her I said what’s up and she said he’s coming round to fix the back gate that he smashed up I couldn’t believe it I’ve never done this before but I decided to drive round to her new flat as in the time that she was with him she had moved which was going to be our place I turned up and and there they both were him driving our car getting out the tolls in the wood to fix the back gate I said to her what’s going on she said she doesn’t see a future with me rightly or wrongly I told him about himself without her he has nothing , I told her that I love her And she asked me to leave I could see in her the face it pained her to say such things and it was all show for him as she had been caught out lying again I wasn’t screaming or shouting he was the calmest person in the world and said we’ve all got history and carried on fixing the gate that was two weeks ago and that’s the last I’ve heard from her I’m sorry if it’s a little bit convoluted and rushed but I’m doing voice to text as it will take me ages to type this , how could she go back with someone like that especially as she has a 12-year-old boy on the and history they have , in the 10 years we were on an off together I’ve never raised a hand to her my main issue why I wasn’t with her I was going through a very messy divorce and of course my depression . The thing is I love this woman with all my heart and a leopard can change its spots I became a better version of myself and I put her first but she has lied to me so many times , Do I just sit back and wait for her to dump him again , he will never change he’s been in prison twice gets paid on Friday when he’s in work gets drunk it’s all words he can never change I’m a decent human being I have proved I can change and for the record when we was together we still had the passion still had great sex we were companions before lovers we were really good friends soulmates if you like I really don’t know what to do advice please would be gratefully accepted