I’ve tried looking for the stately home thread but I can’t find it?
An immediate family member of mine (A) has a lifelong history of being a selfish, needy, attention seeking manipulator. They have changed their tactics from being angry and controlling to being ‘sad and lonely’ or ‘possibly ill’ to get attention and what they want. They make very bad choices constantly and never listen to anything - own agenda all the way.
Myself and my sibling can see through all of it. A has dug own hole for themself and we have little sympathy. I am very low contact and my sibling is no contact - this can be very damaging to us so we have chosen this path to protect us and our own families. A was a physical and emotional abuser and wants us to see that they have changed.
Recently another relative (B) I don’t know well, but who I like has approached us that they are struggling with this behaviour as it’s now all being projected at them. They don’t fully understand why we are low or no contact and are asking for our help - it’s got too much and looking for support or deflection and someone to take the responsibility away from them.
A has a VERY long history of finding other relatives to do their dirty work of putting us back in the FOG box but I’ve made it clear to them where I stand and it’s much better now. A doesn’t understand any of this and is very frustrated, and now perpetually ‘sad’
I have tried to empower B to focus on their own lives and it’s ok to be angry with A for their behaviours but now I feel guilty for B! I don’t know if I should follow my siblings decison of a full cut off. I suppose I still feel a bit guilty