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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Happiness 2nd time around?

1 reply

AJ34 · 28/08/2018 20:19

I have a wonderful 9 year old child from a previous relationship. My ex became really abusive pretty much the moment I fell pregnant. That mental abuse only became worse once our child was born. I honestly don't know how I coped with it but can only think that after giving birth I felt like a superhero that could deal with anything that previously would have made me crumble.

I am now in a new and very happy relationship and have been for 7 years. My partner is the total opposite to my ex and treats me like a queen. We have just moved into our first home together and he really wants a baby. I do too as I'm older now (almost 10 years later!) and want a 2nd chance at being a happy family but I'm just so terrified.

Terrified of things going wrong, being a single parent again. Being pregnant and so vulnerable again, of the unknown and of going through that again with 2 children. I just don't think I could cope. Deep down I know he is a different man and isn't like my ex but I just can't help how I feel.

I decided to stop taking contraception and since I can't stop crying and my anxiety is going through the roof.

Sorry I'm just venting and ranting on....Has anyone else been through a similar thing?

OP posts:
MMmomDD · 28/08/2018 20:41

OP - if he really wants a baby - why doesn’t he first give that potential baby - and you - financial security of marriage?!??!

These threads pop up almost every week.
You areal I have one child and we’re a single mother. Why would you want to open yourself up to potentialy doing it with two children?
The house - unless it’s purchased on both of your names - you won’t have any rights to...
Same with any maintenance if you stay at home and sacrifice your career. And even if you don’t stay at home - you’ll have to take a step back.

Anyway - again. Marriage - first. If he is a wonderful partner you say he is - he’ll do what’s right.

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