Lovebombing V genuine interest

[fiercelikefrida]

I posted this on a thread but didn't get any responses...

One thing I'm curious about is how to we distinguish between love bombing and a genuine connection/interest in you?

I think I was raised to think most men would use me and that that was the worst possible thing so I've attached myself to love bombers.

Obviously I get when it's super full on it's not right... but obviously I want to try and avoid the ones that are clearly not that interested/just interested enough to get me into bed. I'm not dating at all right now, just concentrating on myself because I'm wary and think it's the best thing for me.

But what kind of signs should we be looking for that a man is genuinely interested in a non lovebomby way?

If it's too much too soon then that's a red flag. So my ex told me he loved me after 2 weeks, wanted to move in, see me everyday and it was all very intense. I now know that it's not healthy to do that when in reality you hardly know each other

WIll follow with interest, I’m 5 wks in with someone who wants to be serious, taking about the future a lot and meeting the kids/eventually moving in.

We get on really well but the meeting the kids/moving in thing ain’t happening for a very long time. He’s not “lovebombing” for sex, and appears to just be very clear about what his long terms relationship goals are so I’m sticking in and seeing if it plays out or if, when he realises I’m serious about taking my own sweet time, he does a runner.

I don’t think you can do anything else?

I had a three week rule. No sex for three weeks ( not dates- weeks)

The men did not know this. They just knew that sex wasn’t on the cards.

Usually those who just wanted sex where gone by two.

I'm interested as well. I've been with the current bf since the middle of July, and we've only managed to have sex twice (bad planning / shifts etc), but he is still super-keen, makes the effort to come and see me two or three times per week and is talking about plans going into the new year. We have even made plans to go on holuday for a frw days, which im finding really weird (in a nice way). The only thing we havent discussed yet is Christmas... not sure what will be happening there as he is working both Christmas Day and Boxing Day.

Ive been lovebombed before, and this doesnt feel like that. Im always a bit on my guard, but so far, it all feels ok.