No family or support :(

[chels14xo]

I’m currently pregnant with #2, my DH works 12 days on 2 days off and we already have a 4 year old. I don’t have any family, and since leaving my job last year and moving area I have no friends. We live in a little village 15 miles from the cloest town so a day out has to be planned with bus times. I’m worried what life will be like with 2 children and no one around me. :( Feeling very lonely

i'm sorry you're feeling like this :( Are there any baby groups you can go to to meet some new people?

Are you able to drive?

I never understand moving out of town if you don't drive, it's so isolating

I found the most important thing was to get out the house even if I didn't feel like it. It sounds a nuisance that you have to use the bus but if that's what you have to do then do it! Also, don't be shy about trying to make friends locally with other new mums. If there is t a baby group try a church group (even if you aren't religious) or sports group. Also try local Facebook groups or even try putting a postcard up in the post office or local shop.

Are there any local groups you use with your 4 year old?
You need to be proactive and make something happen. Lots of people
are a bit friendless when they have little kids so no one will think you are odd.

Is there any possibility of moving somewhere you can walk to things? I agree that being a rural non-driver is a bad idea.

I’m unable to drive, so rely on a limited bus service that only runs 5 times a day 👎🏼 (every 2 hours) The village school runs a baby group once a fortnight that we’ve been to a few times.

I wish it was as easy as selling up and moving. :( I’ve never lived in a city, but always lived in large town.. with shops and local parks/clubs. It seemed like the perfect lifestyle/dream when we first moved here.

I would make plans to move long term. As your children get older they will need driving to all sorts of places to see friends or take part in hobbies. It's not going to get easier.

Why did you choose to live in such a remote area if you cannot drive? You need to plan a move, that is the only answer.

When we moved here I was working, driving, and life seemed great... then DH’s job required him to start working away more, so I left work and we had to cut back on luxurious ie a second car 😞 Maybe it’s just hormones (31 weeks pregnant) and the realisation of becoming a mum with 2 children.

As you have to make the best of it I'd make sure that you go to each toddler group session and ask the regulars if there's any meet ups or groups you don't know about. Is there a church? They might run a group, or a library? They usually do rhyme time.

Is there a village Facebook group? You could put a post up asking if any parents want to meet up to go to the park or something. A few people in my village have posted they don't know anyone but they're too shy to go to groups and the response was really kind.

DS starts school this Sept, so I guess that’s a bonus as he’ll start making school friends so I’ll meet parents there. Once #2 is here I’ll be able to go into the city and find baby groups to attend. Hopefully once these holidays are and school started I’ll be able to meet more parents. #positive thinking!!

I’m not on Facebook It might be worth starting up an account. 😀

I don’t drive and hence we have lived in Bath, Oxford, Canterbury , south west London etc. I absolutely refused to move anywhere without ‘stuff’ on the doorstep. It isn’t that I dont like countryside but know I wouldn’t cope, I also like ‘space’ so good to say , just popping to the shops etc. I would be just thinking ahead OP, it is but a short time with young babies and on cold dark evenings I would loved to have been at home at tea time with 2 small kids watching Peppa pig etc and not stuck on a bus etc. I think it’s easier if you actually throw yourself into it and think if it like a job to do for 2 years, after that I would be looking at working and if nurseries etc are impossible around you, I would seriously move where more facilities are on tap