I’ve only been in my current relationship eight months and I ended things last night as his behaviour has been appalling recently.
I’m 35, he is 31. He frequently accuses me of being unfaithful (I haven’t at all) and he has recently shown he has a very warped mind. My mum has been seriously ill in hospital and I’ve been spending time there with her but BF said he had doubts that I was even there and said his gut instinct was telling him I was seeing someone else. I was appalled when he said this and I told him so but he genuinely didn’t think his accusations were inappropriate or weird. There have been other times too when out of the blue he has accused me of cheating such as when he saw a hoodie in my house that he hadn’t seen before and immediately thought it belonged to a man.
He can be very over the top with compliments, told me he loved me after five weeks and has been very intense from day one. He is pressing for us to try for a baby but I know this is absolutely wrong not just because he doesn’t treat me very well but he still lives at home with his parents and he isn’t great with money. He can also be quite cruel such as ‘pretending’ to be angry about things and then backtracking and saying he’s messing around and that I need to lighten up. He has unresolved issues regarding his ex who left him and he frequently has bitter outbursts about her. He’s given me a complex about my age too as he says the only reason I’m with him is because all the good men my own age are taken and he’s my only option. I genuinely feel as though I’ve missed the boat to meet someone else.
He promised to take me out for dinner yesterday as i have had a stressful few weeks with my mum but instead we ended up staying in as he said he couldn’t afford it. Instead he said he will take me out at the weekend when he gets paid but I just don’t think it’s good enough.
I told him yesterday I wasn’t happy and I wanted out. His initial reaction was that I had obviously met someone else and then he threw it in my face about the support he had given me while my mums been ill. I blocked his number but since then he has been calling me repeatedly off withheld number. He’s emailed me and said I can’t leave him as everyone in his life has left him and he can’t let me go. He said he won’t stop trying to get me back. I feel scared and also a bit weak as he has made me feel guilty and like I have made a mistake by ending it (which I know is ridiculous). I’m so anxious about the whole situation as I know that once he realises he’s not getting anywhere with the begging and pleading, I think he will get angry. I am worried he might start trying to turn my friends against me and is going to badmouth me to people, I just think he is capable of being really nasty.
Not sure what I’m hoping for by posting. I just needed to vent as my head is a mess right now.