Can I just block a man if we have plans?

[FatherDickByrne1]

I matched with a man on OLD and we've been chatting on WhatsApp a bit. Arranged to meet Friday. Had a chat on the phone tonight. I'm afraid to say it but he's a tosser!!

He Talked about how he offended a woman tonight by leering at her in a short skirt (and going on to me about how good she looked); went on about a previous flatmate's serious problems and pronounced her 'a moron' and that he has no sympathy for people who are in trouble such as drugs and don't seek help and snap out of it immediately; was rude about my vegetarianism (I can happily take a joke about it!); asked me for ideas on where to take another date as he is quite new in town and generally seemed immature and lacking in empathy.

My question: given that we have made arrangements (just to meet in a bar, nothing has been booked or paid for), can I just message him to say I can't make it and block or is that very rude? I've no intention of going.

Reading this back it's a no brainer, it's just the blocking I feel a bit rude about but I can see him getting a bit nasty.

Who cares really? You owe him nothing. Just text him and say actually you’ve changed your mind. Then block. Or don’t, if you want your suspicions to be proved right.

I wouldn't even say you can't make it, I'd say you'd totally gone off the idea of meeting him after your last conversation. Then block him and breath a huge sigh of relief and watch the bullet you dodged fly past!!

Definitely cancel and block.

You’ve had a lucky escape.

I'm afraid to say it but he's a tosser!!

Don’t be afraid to say it! Say it! He is a tossed! Hell, shout it!!

I would tell him he’s a knob (I might elaborate, I might not) then block him.

While he deserves to be told you are cancelling tbh, I think you'd do the female population a favour of you tell him exactly what put you off him. Call out his horrible behaviour.

In fact I wouldn’t elaborate because then he’ll just hide his real behaviour with the next woman.

You don't owe him anything.

Cancelled and blocked!

I didn't give an excuse as he seemed a genuinely unpleasant individual (he was also very blasé when he brought up animal cruelty) and, as IfIWasaBird says, I don't want to give him the heads up to hide this for the next woman!

Thanks everyone, I know it seems like a silly thing to have asked but I'm both trying to meet a partner and work on my personal boundaries so it's really invaluable to have input sometimes and know that it's ok for me to pull out of things when I'm not comfortable!

It’s all part of undoing the social conditioning we receive as women. We’re trained to be nice. Sometimes we need to stop and think if that’s actually what we want to do.