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Original poster

Match.com - worth it and payments?

27 replies

hedwigge · 21/08/2018 13:47

Tempted to join, have had a few messages that I can't read, but still in the cautious/toe dipping stage after nightmare previous relationship.

Anywho, is this a good site to join or should I be looking elsewhere?

Also, it looks like it's going to be a bit of a pain to cancel the payment - apparently they renew automatically and are hard to get hold of to cancel. Does anyone know if they store card details or if it's done by direct debit instead?

Thanks!

OP posts:
OrangeCarpet · 21/08/2018 13:54

No it’s a crap site IMO. Not worth paying for. Try OKcupid. It’s free and better. Met DH on it.

MargoLovebutter · 21/08/2018 14:49

I tried it for a month. Had two decent quality dates from it. It wasn't too difficult to cancel the subscription - I just had to work out how! If you do it on your iphone it is via your iphone payment account and you just stop it from taking another payment.

I've tried OKC and POF too and had dates from them too, as a free member.

I'd go back to Match again, it was fine but I wouldn't ever pay for 6 months etc.

Janusrock · 21/08/2018 15:00

Personally I hated match but this was over a year ago so it may have changed. You couldn't filter out people by age or location so I got dozens of messages from men 25 years older than me living at the other side of the country. The messages were also quite desperate - quite long, with a begging undertone, and usually a follow up message trying to persuade me to reply if they didn't hear from me within 24 hours. I even got a few telling me how rude I was not to reply.

In comparison, I found that free apps such as tinder or bumble were much easier to strike up a conversation with someone you liked the look of and then go on a date if the conversation flowed well. I went on lots of dates with lovely men and didn't have any bad experiences- ended up meeting DP in real life but he had also used tinder in the past.

Hedwigsangryinch · 21/08/2018 15:42

No. Absolute waste of money. I found my husband on POF!

dilly123 · 21/08/2018 16:03

Agree with above.. waste of money.. very few male members of Match within even 25 miles of me & majority too old for my age range..

isseywithcats · 21/08/2018 16:23

i agree with others when i first dipped my toe in OLD i paid for three months on match, not one single message ok i was in my mid fifties but surely someone would have messaged, joined POF and had a whale of a time, lots of messages , plenty of dates, yes there are some weird people on there but you filter them out, and met my partner on there

Airbiscuits · 21/08/2018 17:27

I met my husband there but that was 15 years ago now (OLD pioneer).

Seemed to have more proper people (professionals in their 30s looking for serious relationships) than the alternatives at the time

Fluffyears · 21/08/2018 21:07

Met DH on match. We’re a few weirdos and I also had one sending me a message admonishing me for not replying. One who obviously didn’t read my post and just skimmed it as I could tell from his message.

LittleKitty1985 · 21/08/2018 21:56

I started OLD on Okcupid and had some good dates, but the quality of men I met increased hugely when I tried Match, & also eHarmony, although ultimately I met my DH at speed dating.

Don't bother with free websites or apps, they are full of people looking for entertainment, ego-boosts and casual sex, & many of them are not single. If you want to meet men who are seriously looking for a meaningful relationship then you need to try websites or events that require them to show their commitment to this by paying upfront.

Boredboredboredboredbored · 21/08/2018 22:01

Littlekitty that is not always the case. I met my dp on POF a year ago and he's the most lovely, genuine bloke I've ever known. I know lots of people on here have met partners via free dating sites so I wouldn't veto them altogether.

Dowser · 22/08/2018 00:43

I met my husband on pof ten years ago and weve been married for three
Never paid for a site.

LellyMcKelly · 22/08/2018 01:07

I did Match. Signed up for 6 months. Went on about 10 dates over 6 weeks, including 6 in 5 days (nearly killed me - don’t do that) and then met my DP and came off it three months into the subscription. We’ve been together 3 years now and it’s great. Regardless of which one you choose, be fully aware of what you bring to the table, treat it as a fun way to meet people you’d never normally meet (I met a transvestite, a big business owner who showed up in an Aston Martin, a bomb disposal expert, an horologist, and a restauranteur, amongst others). It was great fun!) and close down anything that’s not working for you straight away.

daphine2004 · 22/08/2018 01:13

Met DH on Okcupid. If I were single I’d use that again as I had fun and it wasn’t as blatant as tinder or POF, where messages were just “hi XXx, you’re fit. I don’t have any plans today, would you like to meet? I can come to yours?” Bit much for me and I ran for the hills, but it depends what you’re looking for.

ShatnersWig · 22/08/2018 07:55

@LittleKitty1985 I disagreed with you on another thread where you say paid sites are better because the man has paid. I was more polite on that one but can't be arsed to do the long reply. So I'll just say that's bollocks and leave it there.

LittleKitty1985 · 22/08/2018 09:51

@ShatnersWig I've just replied to you on that thread. No need to be rude, I agree with you that OLD has major flaws.

The advantage of paid sites is that it tells you something that you the free ones don't (that a man is actually serious about finding love). Of course there are plenty of men like this on free sites too, but unfortunately you'll have to wade through a LOT of time wasters to find them. & as I've explained in the other thread, you're unlikely to find them attractive in real life, whereas men in paid sites are more likely to have attractive characteristics such as commitment and resources (enough money for the fee anyway), which women have evolved to find attractive.

ShatnersWig · 22/08/2018 09:54

I was just summarising that I think what you said is bollocks (and you've seen the long answer on that other thread, which I've just replied to you on again). I apologise if you don't like the word bollocks, so I shall find another one.

Someone paying £20 for a few months is no indicator at all that a man is serious about finding love! That's just boll...... nonsense! Wink

Mumteedum · 22/08/2018 10:00

It's expensive but easy enough to cancel. Be aware though that it is a one time payment that is equivalent to the monthly figure they advertise, they don't debit monthly.

Also, if you get a free or trial offer for a month, then allow it to renew then you can potentially end up in the most expensive monthly payment. Something close to £50 per month which is ridiculous!

The only way to switch subscription is to cancel your current ine, let it expire and then buy another at a different rate.

I cancelled mine. Ignored it for a bit and then got another offer from them for a fiver for a month!

LittleKitty1985 · 22/08/2018 10:06

@ShatnersWig I politely disagree Wink Tinder is full of people who have no intention of finding love; we all know people who are on it for entertainment and never meet up with people in real life or people in shit relationships who are on it for an ego-boost, or people that use it to hook up with a different person every night. I do not believe that any of these people would be using tinder if it cost £20 a month!

Whatsnewwithyou · 22/08/2018 10:09

I met DH on match 9 years ago. Previous to that I had good luck on eHarmony. I have to agree that paid sites are better at wedding out some of the less suitable men (although that's not to say there aren't any good ones on free sites too, just that there are probably more timewasters in with them).

MarthasGinYard · 22/08/2018 10:14

I used Match years and went on loads of dates. Met a couple of OK specimens Grin

Three Friends have met and married from there also E Harmony.

I think if you've got to do a bit of leg work and type more than about three lines, it's investing a tiny bit more and maybe those paying folk are slightly more serious about their search?

When I did it, no smartphones, I had to actually drive home crank up my ancient desktop and log onto emails see what was what....

Seems to now be just

Swipe and 'next'

ShatnersWig · 22/08/2018 10:19

Ah, but @LittleKitty you're now saying PEOPLE whereas you were saying MEN! Wink

And everyone always says Tinder is mostly for hook ups and casual sex. Whereas almost all the women who have text below their pictures says "not looking for hook ups/NSA/fun" So where does this idea that it's mostly people not looking to date actually come from?

yetmorecrap · 22/08/2018 11:28

It’s all total luck and a fluke on any site, even Tinder has its proper relationship matches

isseywithcats · 22/08/2018 16:08

even the ones who pay on sites can be dodgy, my now ex husband was paying on Match and still living, sleeping , eating, working with me acting normal if it hadnt been for his phone buzzing one morning because he forgot to take it with him , i would never have known the extent of his activity on match.com, when i did find out just how many women he was messaging and meeting when i wasnt in the house, that was the end of us , and then he was free to do whatever he wanted, but for at least a year he was on there saying he was seperated it was all lies

Talith · 22/08/2018 16:16

Omg the amount of horrendous "matches" on there. Wrong age, virtually no overlap on interests, ugh. Not worth the money. Was in it for a year and didn't even move to messaging anyone! I used to screengrab the worst of them and send to my sister when she needed cheering up.

Guardian Soulmates however led me to dozens of really lovely men, and a clutch of decent dates and one long term partner who I'm hanging on to!

dragonflyflew · 22/08/2018 23:15

I thought match was shite. Wish I'd done free sites first.

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