Living with a partner with aspergers

[Pbpepbien]

My girlfriend of 7 years has recently admitted that she has aspergers which has never been diagnosed which i don't understand ?

I'm struggling to cope with this and am increasingly drifting away.

I'll make a few points and will list everything i can think of and you can make a judgement if it's me or her.

She says she wants a child but everytime i initiate sex which i have done in the last month or so 4 5 times she has shunned
me away which has left me feeling frustrated, unattractive and unwanted all she wants to do is cuddle and nothing else ok i'm
not the most romantic person but i can't be all the time sometimes there has to be just plain old desire but there is none
from her its almost as if she despises me.

She doesn't seem to like kissing and i can feel her moving away from me when we do rarely kiss.

I've had a therapist who suggested i try being more romantic like go for a walk or something, again i've tried mentioning
lets take the dog for a walk again i get rejected, i've tried such things as lets stop off for an ice cream and be spontanous
again rejected.

She gets angry because she has a problem with noise so i have to tip toe around the house because if i so much open a drawer
close a door too hard or come down the stairs too fast it will set her off.

At the minute I'm struggling to communicate with her because if i say anything that she percieves wrong or offensive it will set her off
and then if i don't talk she will still have a go at me saying i'm not talking ie my moto is just keep it simple and stum.

I used to be such a silly clown like person loved to make people laugh but that has been ripped out of me because she used to
tell me off and stop being stupid i'm feeling not myself anymore i can't seem to snap out of this morbid depressive mood
i've become a stiff no longer a life loving laughing boy.

I feel so depressed unloved and frustrated not only emotionally but physically, i'm tired and i don't know how much more i
can take living here is just pure hell.

I've read that aspergers people are cold and distant and don't have much physical or mental emotion for the first time i'm
seeing that now. She also wants to get married but again i read that aspergers affected people don't feel love or emotion
so how can that be, is she playing me or punishing me ?

So confused.

I have sympathy, but "aspergers people" is not how you describe someone with an ASD diagnosis. Just like you dont describe anyone as being "X people" (where X is any one characteristic). People with aspergers arent a monolith. Also, she hasnt been diagnosed, how does she know she has aspergers? When did she "realise" or decide? Has she seen a GP to perhaps investigate being referred, does she want a diagnosis? Has she always been as you describe?

Of course people with aspergers feels emotions, and love. So if she does have aspergers, she isnt lying if she claims these things.

That said of she is stopping you being yourself then she isnt treating you as if she loves or cares for you. You sound very unhappy in the relationship. What are either of you getting out of the relationship currently?

First of all Apologise about the way i described it, i didn't mean it in a bad way just not good at describing people.

No she hasn't been diagnosed she just decided all of a sudden saying she used to rock as a kid and be smacked for it ????

Yes i can't be my usual self around her without criticism and it's making me a stiff a total bore and i can't snap out of it.

What we getting out of it, i don't see anything personally i spend most of my time alone, i most times go out alone i suggest we go here or there and everytime it is rejected. Just very lonely at the moment.