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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

So I've been cut off...(long read)

16 replies

juneflowers · 30/07/2018 16:41

So within the past hour, I have been informed by my DH that my mother has cut me off. She feels I have used mine and my DH's child against her. We haven't spoken for over 9 days. Her choosing, not mine. I did try to contact her last week telling her that I really didn't want to argue with her, and I really didn't want us to fall out but received no response. I haven't bothered her because I thought that maybe time would cool her down. See, we had a disagreement.

My Mum left my Dad nearly 8 years ago for my DH's younger brother. It upset both me and my husband but I love my mum, so I have always tried to look past it. I have one younger sister. She left my Dad because he was violent and abusive to her when we were younger. He was violent and abusive towards both me and my sister. My sister has been kept off primary school as a child because he bruised her so badly, and my mum feared social services. My sister couldn't read until much later than most children because everytime she would get a word wrong when my Dad read with her, he would hit her. He smashed all my toys up that I had received three days after my 7 birthday and made me clean it up and put them in the bin. He hit me in the face when I was 11, I was drinking from a glass and the glass broke cutting all of my mouth. The violence stopped when we became teenagers, and turned mainly into verbal abuse. We were sluts, slags and he gambled a lot. He would gamble the rent money, and he apologized with flowers for my mother. He was not a nice man. I left home to move in with my fiance, my 17-year-old sister went away on holiday for a week with her then boyfriend. My mum came to me and my husband asking for help in leaving, which we did. I was upset that she couldn't have done this when we were younger, even after both I and my sister begged her for years.

Ultimately we helped her move when my Dad was away at work, weirdly enough my then soon to be brother in law came along to help, claiming that he was my mum's friend. I thought nothing of it at the time, both I and my mum worked at the same place and my DH's brother worked there as security. It was common for them to take their lunch break together in the canteen, I had never thought anything of it.

After she moved and she was settled in her new home, he was there a lot. Even staying after me and my DH left to go home. She had mentioned that there was someone else, hence the reason she was leaving my Dad and she told me it was my DH's brother. I explained that I felt it was weird and wasn't happy, and she quickly changed it. Explaining that the man in question was a friend of her old school friend's. When I enquired how she had come back in contact with her, she told me that my Grandma had bumped into her whilst out shopping and she had given her my mum's number. This was all a lie obviously, and it was only when I and my DH had driven away from my mum's new home after helping my sister move her belongings in that we saw my DH's brother and my mum round the corner.

Now I want to say I know I have no right getting involved in my mum's relationship, but both I and my sister were receiving phone calls from our dad telling us he was going to commit suicide etc. It was distressing for my sister, and being two years older felt that I had to protect her. I was wounded by the lies my mum had spun, instead of being up front and I was angry at my DH's brother because felt that he had broken up my mum and dad's marriage, confusing I know because I knew it wasn't a healthy or even happy one. I was emotionally all over the place, so I lost the plot. I screamed. Shouting, Cried and stormed off like a child.

I'm not proud of the way I reacted. But I loved my mum so still tried. It's never been easy. My dad became aggressive towards us. At one point my sister moved back in with my dad because he was threatening all sorts, she wanted to help him. It resorted to her hiding in a wardrobe, he trying to punch her. It was horrendous. She felt uncomfortable with my mum because she barely knew my DH's brother and felt weird with him in the house. Ultimately she moved in with me and my DH and lived with us for 5 years.

I might add that after my mum left my dad, a family member attempted to grope and kiss my sister one two separate occasions and when she came out and told us it was me that sorted it out. My mum sat dumbfounded on her bed. I wanted to call the police but my sister begged me to not escalate it so I called him and threatened him. Stupid I know but I didn't know what else to do. I was 19...my husband is 12 years older then me, I couldn't tell him because he would have probably beaten this particular family member so badly...he would have got himself into a lot of trouble. My sister begged for secrecy. She never came into contact with this family member again, and I felt my mum's reaction was quite cruel and callous...hence why she ended up living with me and my DH..

My mum fell pregnant with my DH's brother's child and I was upset because I felt it confused an already bad situation. It strained our relationship to the point where my own MIL called my DH and told him to keep me away from my mum as she felt it threatened the pregnancy. He explained I was merely upset because, at the end of the day, the child would be a sibling yet a niece/nephew. I was struggling with the emotional fall out from my father who started drinking and gambling more than ever. I was struggling and my mother wasn't being a mother.

I'm not explaining my behaviour, I'm just trying to explain that I was emotionally very upset with the whole situation that was happening around me. She lost the baby, and cut herself off from me and my sister. I get that, I understand that it was hard for her.

She ended up losing her home, so I and my DH allowed her and my brother to stay with their dog till they found a new place. She fell pregnant again and told me in the kitchen that she would be angry if I didn't accept her pregnancy and deal with it. Basically cut me off, so I did. Then she had another miscarriage when she moved out into her new home.

Basically, it's been up and down...I try so hard. I really do. But I hate how I can't confide in my mum anymore. She tells her partner, my DH's brother who in turn tells my DH's parents. I hate it. I hate listening to my DH's parents pass comment on how my sister shouldn't be living at home. That it's not fair for their son to have to live with my sister etc. My sister lives in a different country, she escaped her past. She escapes everything. My father ultimately had a stroke so now me and my DH deal with his care home and hospital appointments. She has nothing to do with him now. My mum doesn't obviously either though they aren't divorced.

I try so hard to just get on with people, but I've hurt a lot and my mum never gives me a platform to work out our differences. She tells me how she feels, how she thinks and then cuts me off. Which is what happened 9 days ago. My mum is over 50, my DH's brother is 39. He works 8 hour days, 48 hours a week. He sits on a gatehouse, playing on his phone and reading his kindle.

My mum has a seriously hard job, her two days off are spent in pain. It's very physical, so I suggested that my DH's brother go to work at the same place my DH works. He is a manager there but it's good money for a standard security officer, like £25k a year but over 6 days doing 12-hour shifts - essentially 72 hours. I told her that it would be perfect because she could go part-time, she should be taking it easy.

His words to me where "Why should I work 72 hours a week, while she sits on her ass at home" I have never forgiven him for that comment. We didn't talk about it, then it came up that my mum wanted to apply. Basically, her work the 72 hours while my much younger, brother in law sits on his ass reading books all for 8 hours of the day. It made me angry. My husband was angry. I'm all for girl power but my mum is in her 50's for god sake. I told her I needed a break, that we should just breathe for a bit. I don't want to argue with her, and that the day she was going to watch our daughter for us, I had rearranged childcare for and to just let it sit for a while. It was just an overnight to watch a show in Newcastle. I did it because the last time my mum saw my daughter, my brother in law promised to take our 3-year-old with him knowing that he couldn't. She got her shoes on but he walked out. She cried her heart out. It upset me. I don't like stuff like that, maybe you think I'm overprotective but I don't like it.

We are raising our child who is emotionally healthy. Stuff like that is cruel. Anyway, I left for my driving lesson today and came to find that my brother in law had been over for his birthday present, and he told my DH that mum has cut me off because she feels I had used our daughter against her. I don't feel I have. I mean, my mum has been off all week and not once has she contacted me to spend time with our daughter. Which I would have gladly allowed. I felt it was wrong of me to ask my mum for space but still expect her to watch our child overnight, our house and our dogs. That was why I had rearranged the childcare and house sitting.

This has turned into a huge thread...I'm really sorry. I didn't mean for it to be this long, it's just I started typing and it all came out. I know I'm horrible for the way I have treated my mum, our relationship being up and down just because she is with my brother in law...I just feel the way she has gone about it. It's just all wrong. I think I'm hurt, she could find the strength to leave my dad once all the damage had been done. The whole thing makes me so sad, I love my mum. Adore my sister. I help my Dad even though he has been a complete dark cloud in my life. I just don't know. I'm just upset and don't really know what to do?

OP posts:
TrollTheRespawnJeremy · 30/07/2018 19:02

Cut yourself off from all of them but DH.

This whole Jeremy Kyleish fiasco is just you doing things for other-not very nice- people.

Put your DC first. Move away if you have to. Honestly- you owe them nothing.

bertielab · 30/07/2018 19:09

Cut them all off apart from your DH and DC. I agree -you don't owe any of them anything.

HollowTalk · 30/07/2018 19:18

I agree. Cut yourself off from your dysfunctional family.

HappyBumbleBee · 30/07/2018 19:24

Cut all contact, look after yourself and your family unit and don't deal with any of it until you feel you want to/or don't. For now I think a massive time out for you xxx

SmileSweetly · 30/07/2018 19:35

No one should have to deal with so much dysfunction and hurt.

She is doing you a favour by cutting you off, enjoy a well earned break from all this drama.

Look after your relationship with your DH, and your child, look after you precious little family unit & screw the rest of them. Really, you don't deserve all this shit.

Oldstyle · 30/07/2018 19:44

Well done for building a good life with your DH and DC - that must have taken so much strength after all you have had to deal with in your life. It really sounds as if your mum adds nothing to your life though, not now, not during your childhood. Yes she has been through some horrendous stuff but so have you - and you are still managing to care about others and to support them emotionally and practically. I agree with the other posters - if you can possibly shut yourself off from your mum (and your dad who is the root cause of all this misery) please please do. Focus on yourself and the people who care about you and who will support you. You deserve better than this.

Kaykay06 · 30/07/2018 20:34

Doesn’t sound like your mother has ever put you first or considered your feeelings

You’re not getting anything from the relationship except upset and you sound like a nice person. For your, and your daughters sake live yourself with your dh and forget mum and bil, they sound toxic.

It’s hard to go nc but she’s shown over and over who is the most important person in her life (herself) not you

Meeep · 30/07/2018 20:58

As an outsider it sounds like both your parents were/are really bad for you and your sister.

I don't think you've ever had a chance to work through that or talk about it properly with anyone? Really that's what you need if there's any way you can do that.
The mini dramas going on are just temporary effects - and I'm sure there will be others coming in the future - of your mum and dad being selfish and cowardly and rubbish at being parents.

Don't worry especially about her saying she's cut you off, it's part of the big picture. This is just yet another shitty move on her behalf. You are not to blame. Getting upset at her sometimes must be expected and normal to be honest.

I'm really sorry she didn't protect you from your dad when you were growing up.

I think going more low contact would probably be healthier for you. If you were my best friend I'd be telling you to move away from your mum and dad so they won't be in your life as much I think! I know it isn't that easy with kids but really I think that's what you need!

Meeep · 30/07/2018 21:04

Go move where your sister moved to!

MadMags · 30/07/2018 21:12

My god that was a long and fucked up read.

Stay. Away. From. These. Toxic. People.

Seriously. I'd cut every one of them off. Except your sister, obviously.

freetoagoodhome · 30/07/2018 21:18

Let your mother crack on. She’s moved from one loser to another and values men more than her children. Leave your dad to it. He’s a monster. You reap what you sow.

You are a people pleaser and feel unnecessary guilt. That’s evident from your apology to a bunch of strangers for putting your thoughts down. Don’t! People don’t need to read if they don’t want to.

Look out for yourself, your DH, your DC and your sister. No one else.

Good luck Flowers

Cynara · 30/07/2018 21:25

That was a grim read. I agree with pp. Cut off the lot of them apart from your DH and your sister. Move away. Concentrate on bringing up your DD away from this dysfunctional shitstorm.

ExceptionFatale · 30/07/2018 22:15

I've just read a post on another forum talking about being raised by dysfunctional (narcissistic personality disorder in particular) parents and how many children that have grown up with an NPD parent have begun to change their perceptions of the very textbook "NPD parent and Non NPD/Enabling Parent" to a very different perception after the death of the NPD parent/separation of parents. The new perception/belief being "Grandiose NPD parent and Covert NPD parent", the covert NPD parents traits not fully surfacing until the death of the grandiose. It was an interesting read for certain.

I'm not attempting to diagnose either of your parents with NPD, let me just make this super clear. I have however seen toxic parents from all over the psychological spectrum seem to fall into this "Active/Passive Abuse" role in my own life as well as friends Ive known throughout my life. While both parents are actually more than capable and willing to abuse their children while in a relationship, the more dominant personality abuser dishes it out so horrendously that the more passive abuser remains silent for whatever reason (or justifies the behavior) which looks to the child experiencing the abuse that they are the good parent, only to find that when the dominant abuser is removed, the "good" parent steps into the spotlight to showcase their own dysfunction which had previously been overshadowed.

(Sorry for the word vomit, while not as concise as I like, hopefully this gets my thoughts across)

@juneflowers With the above in mind, I'd like to offer my hugs and support to you. Both you and your sister are victims of BOTH of your parents dysfunctional and abusive behavior. I will agree with the other posters that have said cut off all familial ties except for your DH and DSis. Please get yourself into some form of trauma/abuse survivor therapy as I suspect it will help you in maintaining firm boundaries with your parents. You sound like a true empath, which coming from this environment I liken to a beautiful lotus growing out of the muck. Unfortunately your parents will trample over your empathetic nature time and again - it has nothing to do with you, and EVERYTHING to do with them. This is a beautiful blessing in disguise, you could start the beginning of the rest of your life free from the previous generations abuse, breaking the cycle for the next, and living free from what will continue to be inflicted on you.

When I was 15 my therapist granted me the greatest gift I had received for my mental health while discussing my terribly abusive mother. I had expressed the sentiment "Well even though she did x,y,z horrors to me. I still love her. She's my mom, I have to love her!"

He put down his notepad and asked me "Why?" I was taken aback by this letting out a nervous stuttering laugh as my brain seemed to implode. He spoke up again "You don't have to love anyone, whether they are family or otherwise. Your mother hasn't provided you with many basic human rights, let alone kindness. If you don't feel any love towards this woman, don't beat yourself up - feel proud. You know your self worth, and you understand you deserve better".

I'd say the same to you, you owe nothing to either parent, especially looking after them in old age. Let karmic debt be fulfilled and put yourself first, for the rest of your life.

Hugs, support, and Flowers - feel free to message if you ever need to talk!

TwinkulTwinkle · 30/07/2018 22:21

Man, you need lots of Flowers Flowers Flowers You've been through a lot and I think previous posters are right when they say that you may need to break away from your Mum, Dad and BiL. Family dynamics are hard to change ... you probably have always played the part of 'peace-maker' - to try to stop your dad from getting angry and attacking you, your sister or your mum - whilst you still had to live under their roof. But it's an out-dated, no longer necessary role for you to continue playing - and it should never have been yours to take up in the first place. As a pp suggested - if it is at all possible, maybe it would be useful to have some counselling to explore why you are looking after your dad after his stroke?

If you do decide to keep them in your life, be careful that your next assigned family role doesn't become that of 'the scapegoat'...(your sister has taken herself out the equation - so only you left) eg. the one who caused your mum to miscarry (ignoring the obvious increased odds as a woman gets older), the one, who if you didn't help your dad after your mum left him would be responsible for his suicide; the one, who if you didn't look after your dad now that he is sick - would be the uncaring daughter ... you see the pattern?

Do you want to continue to be involved - because if there's any way to pin the blame you for the inevitable next thing that will go wrong - they most likely will.
Of course this is all just my opinion, a stranger on the internet. I hope that you will be able to access the support that you need to make the decision that's right for you Flowers.

Shortstuff08 · 31/07/2018 06:21

Her cutting you off is ideal. This whole situation is fucked up.

I don't even know where to start.

But you need out of it. What you think of your mum's Dp/ your bil is irrelevant. You shouldn't be getting involved in who works what hours, how tired she is, wether he should get a job that is more hours. That's irrelevant too.

You should not be involved in their lives to the extent you. But because your dad was abusive, I think you over look you mothers massive failing as a parent. These failings are not because she was abused, but because she is completely selfish.

You feel the need to involve yourself and try and help her out, because she makes you feel guilty if you don't and then shit if you do.

For your own well being, you need to keep away from them. Get space, don't involve yourself in what you perceive as fair etc. Protect yourself.

As an aside I know a few men who are with older women, and without exception it's as it is in your situation. The man is a man child, who let's the woman do all the work. I don't mind age gap relationships, but it always seemed unhealthy, when I have known this situation in real life. I also get that I am talking about a handful of situations and it's not definite proof that all age gap relationships (where the man is younger) are unhealthy. But the op is describing one situation, I know of perfectly. Except the woman isn't with her daughters bil. It's almost the exact situation.

FolderReformedScruncher · 31/07/2018 07:04

Good post Exception
Op you sound lovely. Emotionally intelligent and balanced despite what has been meted out to you in the past and I'm afraid I agree with the others. Your Mum might have cut you off but you need to take this and run with it. I suspect it's all for drama and to get a reaction. I think your reaction should be to accept it as gratefully as a lottery win and maintain the NC with all your might. As another poster said, moving away might be a good idea if it's possible. You are in the habit of solving all the problems yourself. Please stop. It is killing you. Concentrate all your lovely energy on your own family unit and amazing things will happen for you.

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