This has been a kind of relationship for 8 months, when we finished it, and since then mostly off for the last 5 months because it is unlikely to go anywhere. He has always said he doesn't want anything serious (divorced) and I am in the same position.
However, there has always been a huge connection, physical and otherwise. I have not felt like this with anyone previously. Going no contact never seems to last.
He'll message me or I'll break and message him, and we usually end up meeting at a pub for a drink. When we meet it is very easy and enjoyable, we enjoy catching up, and the chemistry is still immense (although we have not done anything about that recently).
I should really be turning him down and not meeting up with him because it is messing with my head now. I don't feel strong enough a lot of the time to do this because when I am with him the rest of the world does not exist (yes, I am aware how ridiculous that sounds). Somehow we have never spoken about what is going on as it seems easier not to...And I have not brought it up because I suppose I am trying to protect myself in a way. So I have no idea how he feels.
I guess I am asking why he would be wanting to still meet up with me when seemingly not interested in anything relationship wise? We can never be just friends as too much has happened and the physical attraction is still so strongly there.
And what should I do moving forward? He makes me feel a loss of control over my emotions and actions which I find very unsettling.