Feeling lonely in our relationship

[K8eee]

So I haven't posted for about 3 years, as I couldn't for the life of me remember my password, but now I'm back!

Anyway, I need to have a moan and groan and some advice from elsewhere other than my best friend and my husband. My brain is quite little frazzled, and I'm getting slightly worried I'm going to make myself ill.

My husband and I have two businesses, and three kids under 4. We are very alone as a family, but have a set of friends who are the only ones we could rely on to look after our kids if we wanted to go out. This last year has been bloody tough on me mostly mentally, and last week I had a bit of a break down. I felt my family would be better off without me, and I nearly packed up a bag, and some money and was going to up and leave. Something inside me told me not to, and I broke down in tears. I've told my husband, and my mood has been up and down for months. He is totally unaware of this as most men are with feelings and giving sympathy. I have so much I want to write but I don't want to bore you.

You sound like you just need a bit of a break, even if it's for 2 nights. Could you book away for a night or two by yourself and just be able to chill out? Go to a spa or even just to get a good night's sleep? You need a life outside of work/family life and it sounds like you don't get much time for yourself, which can drive anyone crazy! Is there anything in particular that is bring you down? If it's a few things that are all adding up, then try break it down and take on one thing at a time. Don't be too hard on yourself, with 2 businesses and 3 young kiddies you're doing an amazing job already I'm sure! x

Thank Amelia499. I'm not sure my friend would want three extra kids aswell as her own for a couple of nights. We've not had a holiday in over 18months, and I'm dying for one. My brain feels frazzled and like I'm going to explode. I get narked about the tiniest of things and feel I could cry and any minute 😔 I really feel crap

Could your husband watch them on his own for a night? If you explain to him you need a bit of a break? It's normal to feel that way sometimes, life can be hard especially when you have kids

Would it seem ok and normal to hide away and run away from what's bothering me though? I really don't know what is best. I've been suggested the idea of a counsellor but to me that's admitting defeat

Can you afford to book a regular babysitter or a cleaner or an au pair? Someone that will offer you regular respite?

It really depends by what you mean by ‘running away’. It’s normal and completely ok to feel like you need a break or some you time especially if you’re feeling stressed or feel like everything’s getting a bit much. But if you’re actually running away from a problem then I’d say no, you’ll need to tackle it head on until you feel better again.