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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Tough times

3 replies

Foundmyanger · 29/07/2018 07:21

Really going through it
Have small kids on my own as DH left to be with OW half his age, one is a baby
Hurts that it is getting serious between them. It’s clear it is not a case of grass is greener and now I am at the point where I wouldn’t want him back anyway. But it still hurts. How can I get over this hurt.
The betrayal by the one person who was meant to have my back - he has done this.
Feeling fragile please be gentle

OP posts:
KittenThatWantsToRoar · 29/07/2018 08:22

Sending you hugs and flowers (don't know how to do the emoji yet).

Gosh I really feel sympathise. I cannot imagine how you're really feeling but I know what it is to lose somebody.

You are grieving right now. Grieving him, grieving the idea of your marriage and family, and grieving your broken trust.

That's going to be a process and it won't be quick, but it will change with time.

What you really need now, is to get as much support as you can. Don't be afraid to ask. Practical support, hugs, people to listen.

You have us here; we will give you kindness and understanding, but find some people in your everyday life too, if you can.

What's been done to you is horrible and it's not your fault, so don't allow feelings of shame to creep in, as I know these often do in situations like this.

It was his choice to abandon any attempts to save your relationship and to go off with someone else. Right now, it's your choice to love yourself and let your loved ones support you.

I hope that just one day at a time, you can enjoy your children and heal bit by bit, but be kind and patient with yourself.

Lots of love, Kitten.

eve34 · 29/07/2018 08:52

I'm sorry you are hurting. There isn't a hurt like it. Be kind to yourself. Gather good people around you. It will pass I have been told. I'm 6 months down the line and still cry most days.

Would you want someone who would walk away so easily to be your go to person. You deserve better.

Foundmyanger · 29/07/2018 09:19

Thanks this has helped a lot

“Would you want someone who would walk away so easily to be your go to person” - no indeed

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