Thoughts on large age gaps 18 and 40

[CornishGoblin]

Sister 18 with a 40 year old, seems to have been some big secret relationship for a while at work. I feel uncomfortable, why does a 40 year old want to go out with a young acting 18 year old?

What an old perv.

Don't voice your disapproval because she'll be more resolute - teens like to rebel. Just be there, ready to offer support when it fails.

Grim. What on earth can they have in common?

I have an 18 year old I would not be happy at all if she was dating a 40 year old. What the hell would they even talk about.
Her dad would hit the roof.

When I was 18, I got engaged to a man who was 34. When I look back I cans he that he was quite damaged (combat related PTSD) but he wasn't a perv or malicious and he treated me well. I had been managing more or less on my own since I was 12 though, so was fairly mature.

My parents handled it surprisingly well. My dad was his commanding officer for a while and could have made life hard for him but chose not to. While I was away at uni, he was invited to their house, they were very welcoming to him and generally behaved as if he was the son-in-law they always dreamed of. They did the same with my next unsuitable boyfriend, who was horrid (although not older) and I think it did help me to end the relationships sooner than I otherwise would have, because I didn't feel I had anything to prove to them.