How I get him out of my mind

[TheThornBirds]

I have the classic situation. I am attracted to my gp. I am married with kids and he seems to be too (ring).
I am attracted to intelligence. My dh is university professor.

He is lovely and sexy but I know there is not going to be anything ever. He is a gp and I am "vulnerable" patient.

Should I change to another gp? I really would not like to.

If you want to get him out of your head then changing GPs would be a start

Yes, for his sake.

And you can’t get him out of your head after a 6 minute appointment?

I have seen him several times because of my chronic condition. But as he knows my condition he probably wants to keep his distance.

Last time I had a crush was ten years ago. He was my colleague and I think he fancied me too. Nothing happened between us. I made the decision not to go further but it took quite a while get over him.

At the moment he is trying to get the secondary care to sort something for me. I think I have to wait until the problem is solved.

But as he knows my condition he probably wants to keep his distance

OP he is keeping a professional distance because that's his job. Not because he fancies you. It's a bit worrying that you're thinking about him in this way, it puts him at risk should you ever feel 'spurned'

Even with secondary care referrals in hand, there is no reason why you need to keep seeing this particular doctor

Yes I know he has to keep his professional distance but if he were to meet me somewhere else first time he might have a second thought.

I not going to flirt or anything else when I see him. I managed that with the ex colleague.

How old are you OP? This all sounds a bit “14 year old fancies Woodwork teacher”.

(That wasn’t me, by the way. It was my BF at school and it was very, very painful for all involved, including his fiancé who taught us Maths.)

...oh dear

How often do you see your GP????

Usually I don't see go that often but at the moment there is problem with my medication. Secondary care ask me to go to gp to sort some things out. Gp sorts and then doesn't know what to do next. He contacts secondary care and so on it goes. But I think the problem should be solved soon.

You think a lot of yourself don't you? 'he might give you a second thought?'. No offense but he probably wouldn't look twice at you, he's married.

Focus on your husband, if you can. If you can't, leave him. He deserves better than a wife who fantasises about other men often and wants them to want her too.

Leave him alone you sad fruitcake.

This is how those stories end up in the daily mail about a doctor being accused of taking advantage of patients, being dragged through GMC courts and possibly being struck off. All because of rejecting the advances of his “vulnerable” patient... sorry to be harsh but I do know a colleague who has been through this.

I agree with Barbaro. There is no reason to suppose if he were to meet me somewhere else first time he might have a second thought. Do you generally think that all men, married or not, find you sufficiently attractive that they are irresistibly drawn to you? This seems like an odd assumption. There is either more to this than you included in your op or, you are building this up in your head to the point where you should certainly change doctors immediately.

Oh. I meant that if we were to meet in another setting he would not be interested in me because I am a "fruitcake". Anyway I haven't made any advances and I won't.

This is my first crush in ten years. I have had much more handsome doctors/ or any other men but no feelings.

Yes sure you have had many handsome drs... I’m sure men fall at your feet so much so that you need to post on mumsnet! Good luck!

I think you need to get a grip OP. And a hobby.

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2552541/

This is a recognised syndrome, OP.

There is a book getting good reviews at the moment, a shrink’s case notes, and the one focused on most is a woman who fell passionately in love with her dentist during a procedure, and believed it was mutual, despite him doing everything possible, including non-molestation orders etc, to convince her otherwise. In the end he moved his family to the Middle East to get away from her.

Don’t head down that route.

It seems that I can't write what I mean :). Again I meant that I have met handsome men who I haven't found interesting, and they haven't found me.

Syndrome sounds interesting but I think I just found him attractive. I was able to resist my ex colleague without starting to pester him.

I was able to resist my ex colleague without starting to pester him

OK. I’m calling bullshit now. No one could be this un self-aware.

i didn't strictly propose to the anaesthetist who did both my epidurals, but i did ask whether he often got proposals :D anyone being kind and attentive is a very attractive quality. i

Change your GP and change your taste in chicklit. You sound bonkers.

The op has stated she is vulnerable. Can we lay off with the "fruitcake" and "bonkers" comments?

The only “vulnerable” person is the poor doctor who is being preyed upon merely because of his job. I have a colleague that went through this and ended up in front of GMC fighting to save his reputation.

er, how is she 'praying' exactly Serious ? I bet he doesn't even know she is attraxted to him, he just views her as another patient (OP says she never flirted).

sorry, preying!