I want to try again with him!

[Cocoloco84]

Have namechanged for this

I was seeing a bloke for around 6 months, broke up about 6 months ago also. I held back at the time and could be stand offish- I wasn't over my previous ex at the time and had put with through hell with EA and DV. It was too soon. This guy is lovely, and absolutely everything I could want in a relationship, but in hindsight I was too scared of getting hurt at the time.

We broke up because he could tell I wasn't over my horrible ex, and he thought "we'd gone as far as it would go". At the time, he was totally right, but each time I meet up with him lately I realise how good wed be together! I'm also totally over the horrible ex and know it wouldn't hold us back if we were to try again.

What do I do?? Do I just leave it and put it down to experience? Or do I tell him and hope he'll forgive me for not trying hard enough previously??? Seriously, I could kick my prior self!

Fooking hells bells, sorry for typos 😂

If I was in your shoes I would leave it. He tried 6 months with you and came to the conclusion it wasn't going to work.

We often minimise the role we played in break-ups, he may think differently on how you were standoffish with him

Fair point

There's nothing to forgive. You came out of what sounds like a horribley nightmarish situation (so sorry you had to put up with EA and DV☹) which would have lefr you incredibly vulnerable.

Tell him how you feel. Take it one step and one date at a time if need be. He might wanna take it slower this time.
Does he seem as happy to meet you as before? Can you still feel a spark between you?

Just go for it! And good luck xx

Thank you buns and yes, there's definitely still a spark! He regularly invites me for drinks, both with friends and just us two. We get on so well! I now feel I've totally lost my stand-offishness and I feel devastated, I feel like I've let something special go all because of the damage my awful ex done to me. I'm completely over him now and never want him to have any effect upon my life ever again! I suppose I might as well try, even if I fail I know we'll still stay friends, so nothing to lose I suppose! Thank you

I say go for it, forget about the other 6 months and treat this as a brand new relationship / fresh start and forget about the old relationship and you were in a different place then :)

Go for it girl!

If you're still seeing each other regularly he obviously still has time for you, it's not very often something doesn't work out and the guy wants to stay friends.. I've a feeling he will be very happy if you talk to him. He's just been waiting for you... now you're ready :-)

GO FOR IT! X

Eek thank you all! What brought it on was I was at an event last night he was organising and invited me to so I was chatting to him for a portion of he evening. We've been texting since so I'm going to suggest we meet up soon. I'll then tell him my thoughts and see where we go from there. Nothing ventured, nothing gained and all that!

I wasn't over my previous ex at the time and had put with through hell with EA and DV

You can want to be over your ex and be very want him to have an effect on your life ever again but that’s not how it works.

Go for it but please don’t try to gloss over your past. If you do, these things tend to fester and have a worse effect than lower lever regular reflection and acknowledgement does.

Best of luck

Let us know how you get on please.