Being bullied by a parent -advice needed

[bandthenjust]

Hi,
I'm married, have kids, moved out of 'home' ten years ago, but I'm still being bullied by my mum.
Today I told her that certain things she's been saying u psets me, but rather than t alking to me about it, she's blamed it on me for 'taking it wrong' and she's denying it happened. It resulted in her getting angry and say ing she's no longer going to see me.
She then contacted me to say I've upset her numerous times, for which I apologised. She wont hear it.
Bit late to ask it or eve n do anything about it but did I do the right thing? Am I at fault?
I knew before hand it wo uld end up this way, but I now feel really sad and gui lty. any help or advice wo uld be appreciated.

It's sounds as though you set a boundary and she wasn't used to it. You are entitled to set boundaries and express how you feel - it's just that toxic people get angry when you don't dance to their tune. You definitely haven't done anything wrong and as a daughter you should certainly be able to speak to your mum if you feel upset.

What was your childhood like?

Thanks for replying, errr... Difficult. Sh e weren't about much and when she was it weren't great. s ometimes it was ok. She used to g et upset about things and react in bizarre ways: she once suggested a double suicide because - she couldn't put a wardrobe together. I know that sounds stupid, and it is, but th ats an example of what she was like.
When I first became pregnant, her reaction was ' dont get excited, it'll probably die'. So yeah not the best relationship. Strangely, she'll probably say it's good.