Religious BIL isolating sister and reading her email - wwyd?

[JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff]

DSis and I have not had masses of contact in recent years. She lives in another country and has struggled with fertility, including losing twins last year. DH and I have 3 under 3.5 inc twins so I tend not to want to message her about my stuff as I don't want to rub it in.

A few months since, DSis announced that BIL had rediscovered his family's religion and got really into it. Then DSis did too, praying regularly, going to special women's religious lessons, learning scripture. Recently my other sister visited and said DSis now veils when she goes to worship. Also her new spiritual leaders seem to have told her she wasn't able to have a baby as she and BIL weren't properly married, ie in their faith group.

A couple of weeks ago, DSis emailed to say she and BIL had "got married" (they have been legally married for yonks but in the eyes of their faith now). We hadn't been invited but BIL family who are the same religion were there. When my mum emailed to ask for pics, BIL emailed back (from DSis email!). Turns out he now spies on shares her email acct as they share everything now, as a "truly married" couple.

Our other sis invited DSis to come stay with her for a bit but DSis won't as she doesn't want to miss worship even for one week

Aibu to be concerned? And wwyd?

The first thing I thought was cult. My maternal grandmother was Catholic so I grew up going to service with her. This doesn't sound like any Catholicism I've encountered.

I tried doing a look on Google based on the limited info you provided. One PP said this didn't sound like Opus Dei, unfortunately that was the main one that kept popping up.

Here's a list of organizations you might look at, I found the list on www.catholic.com/magazine/print-edition/are-there-cults-in-the-catholic-church and while the article was mostly positive fluff - here's a few from the article:

"New movements such as Regnum Christi, Legion of Mary, Focolare, Cursillo, the Neocatechumenal Way, Communion and Liberation, and Opus Dei fit this description (though the latter is technically a personal prelature). They have subjected themselves to the scrutiny of the Church and have received at least some level of Church approval. "

Knock on wood it helps. Being in the US myself, but in California so far from NY I fear for your sister :( I'm sorry you're going through this

I grew up RC, but this definitely sounds more cultish than catholic, with a bit of controlling husband thrown in. The only thing I can think to do is keep the lines of communication open including letting her know there’s always room for her if she needs it (maybe phrase it as if she’d like to come and visit?) avoid any subject your DS wishes to avoid, and just be there for her as much as possible. If she eventually wants to leave, she’ll at least know you’re there for her and she’s not alone.

Blaming her fertility issues on not being religiously wed is cruel and sets off major alarm bells for me!

💐 for you and yours, And sorry you’re going through this.