Sick of petty rows like this...am I in the wrong?

[Lulu2515]

DH took DC1 out swimming this morning. I stayed at home with the baby and attempted to jet wash the patio. Baby unsettled, didn't fancy watching me jet wash so I didn't get lots done.
DH gets back and says that as it's boiling, he'll pop out and take DC1 to see his family. I said, oh great can you take the baby? Then I can get stuff done (finish jet washing, mop the floors, do his ironing).
Cue the baby starts crying and I asked DH to get him as I'm covered in gardening muck.
10 mins later, DH is huffing about getting things ready and tells me I'm being a dick but doesn't want to discuss in front of the kids. I sent DC1 upstairs on an errand and asked him what he meant- he said I was a dick and he just wanted to pop out but now this was an epic mission. I explained what I wanted to do and said to leave the baby if he wanted. He said he could iron his own fucking shirts and stormed out with both of them.

Sorry, this is a boring and ridiculous row but I'm not sure ive done anything wrong but somehow I'm the one left feeling awful and I don't know why. Am I wrong?

You know what, too? When he was out with both kids, other people would've been looking after them. I would bet he sat there with a drink moaning and having people tell him how great he was.

Plan something for yourself next weekend and just mention to him that you’re just popping out as you breeze out of the front door. Probably very childish but what I’d do

All these hours later and this is still going on? Strewth.
One or both of you need to learn to let things go. Life's too short.

One or both of you need to learn to let things go. Life's too short.

I agree. It's one of our relationship flaws.

We've actually had a very level conversation where he apologised and I managed to articulate my view that it was all his fault

Yes. The one doing the sulking needs to learn to let things go, rather than using sulks as a control tactic to get his own way.

I hope the apology leads to an improvement in his behaviour.

So your jet washing the patio and he moans that he’s having to take both dc out - he’s IS a dick!

Do not iron his shirts either!

This is normal.
You’re the woman, you should be happy that he takes his kids to swimming. I’m not sure what else you expect?
He’s working, like you used to. But you’re off now. You’re in charge of kids things. Why should he know where all the swimming stuff is when you’re off?

@eightfacesofthemoon I can't tell if you're joking or being a dick

I’m not joking! But perhaps not in the way you think. I am not being a dick either. I am trying to help you see this is not normal. And perhaps you can find some anger somewhere to stop this shit.
It’s not acceptable

Do not turn into the go to slave for everything

It’s the biggest choice in your life.

He was huffing and you sent DC1 upstairs so you you ask him what was up? See, you played into the game there. Never do anything different at all because someone is huffing and puffing.

If he were interested in a civil chat then he could choose a moment to speak to you.

His huffing was not your problem. You really have to learn to not want to manage his emotions for him. It might make managing his dickness easier.

OP why do you think you are very sensitive? Has your DH told you that?

What kind of things does he say you are sensitive about? Might be a good opportunity to get some perspective on this thread while on the subject to help you see clearly?

Glad he's apologised for being rude OP!