Revenge

[Ta77Blonde]

I want revenge on a Narcissist Sociopath no matter how long it takes. Revenge is a dessert best served cold and Im standing by the fridge. Any ideas?

Get a “revenge body” abs the lot. By the time you’ve completed this and posted you’re progress pics on the gram I’m guessing he’ll be well out of your head space.

Lol at the comment above, that made my night! 😂

I understand that craving for revenge.

In my case I fantasised endlessly about his death by ever lurid torture. The books etc will tell you this isn't a good idea but I needed this outlet and I put my whole heart and soul into it. It was the only thing that gave me peace and, literally, sleep - those fantasies lulled me to sleep at a time I couldn't sleep bcs I was so traumatised.

So I'd say go for it, give it your best/worst - in the planning. You have to get that poison out. Let it roll through. Ime it passes - eventually.

Or meditate on flowers and streams and bambi. Each to their own, it's not my way.

When you're ready and can face it, take a look at Melanie Tonia Evans and healing from narcissistic abuse. She may or may not be your thing.

Be kind to yourself, you have been through a dark hell and it'll take a while to heal

Thank you everyone.

OP I once went through all this emotional response after 7 years with a narc. All manner of cruelty etc.

This is what happened to me after i finally caught him cheating and it ended:

I spent the fist year without him in anger thinking of revenge (even though i had moved on and got serious with my now DH)

The next few years were happier with DP (now DH) but still hell bent he should 'pay'.

After that i forgot all about him but would not marry DP because of 'bad experiences'.

After 10 years i did marry DH!

Another two years later from our marriage I heard he died in horrific road accident which may have been suicide!

I just felt sad like as if I'd hear someone from school had died - and that's ALL I felt. I never think about any of it at all now! In fact this thread just reminded me about him tbh!

This too will pass OP.

Please God, Im looking forward to life without him. Not even interested in meeting anyone else but if I do I hope he opens my eyes to how I should have been treated.
Im so happy for you AllrightNow...

A narcissist would be thrilled to know that they can arouse this level of emotion.

"Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves"? - cliche but true. Do you recall Vicky Pryce ?

The best revenge is to completely forget about him so you will show him without you don't need him.

A narcissist will get pleasure out of your desire to reap revenge. He will twist anything you do to his advantage in his head.
The only way is to block and ignore

I understand completely, ex is a compulsive liar and I suspect sociopath. The damage they do is unlike anything else.
I know the feeling of wanting revenge and I got a little bit by getting him sacked from his job. He had a new one way before I had healed from what he did to me, but it did give me some satisfaction and I don't regret it.
The best revenge is living a good life, all the things that make a good life for normal healthy people that a narc will never know or appreciate, like having the love and respect of your family, good friends, being independent, being able to look yourself in the mirror. (no ideas how most of them sleep at night)
They get their own karma by having to live with themselves, destined to keep making the same mistakes over and over again. It's a very hollow and sad existence.
You will get over this op I promise. I didn't feel like I would, couldn't imagine ever waking up not thinking about it or feeling scared and broken, I couldn't imagine ever even looking at another man again
But I'm a much better stronger person now so I'm kind of grateful to him in a way (still wouldnt spit on him if he was on fire)
There are lots of resources on line including secret groups on Facebook that will help you if you can find them., I also recommend reading psychopath free by jackson mackenzie
Just as an aside, narcissism and psychopathy are NOT mental illnesses. They are personality disorders. There is no cure, the only course of action is to get as far and as fast as you can away from one.
No contact is the only way.

The problem with revenge is that you truly do not know how far someone will go to get their own back. As previous posters have mentioned, just move on with your life.

Not much point saying forget it move on get over it.
That will happen but people telling you to do that won't help. It's a long and hard process, it takes time and a lot of hard work, self care, reflection and yes the anger is just part of the process, you have to go through it to get to the next stage.
Those comments were so frustrating to me, and really show the gulf in people's understanding, how lucky you are to be able to say get over it that you cannot really have known one of these people. I was quite bitter about how dismissive people can be.
Helping others is a good idea and if you can find a group you will be able to do that.
I saw a suggestion here, not the same circumstances but it would work, to make a page on the Internet that people can find by searching his name, maybe to warn other potential victims.

Looking good and out-earning your ex are the best revenge

Well said ilike

Having lived through a breakup with my own sociopathic narcissist I can honestly say as many others have, ignoring him and moving on and meeting someone new has been the ultimate revenge. He cannot stand it one bit that he no longer has the control he used to. Beyond that, I would be very careful about prodding the monkey as it were. He is clearly not scared to throw his weight around and people like this never believe they are wrong and feel like they are justified in their retaliation. They are forever the victim and you will live in the same cycle forever if you don't completely cut him out and move on

Many of us think ex partnets are narcissistic sociopaths. They usually aren't. Once we are over the relationship we see them more clearly. Just put him out of your life, look ahead, focus on you and never look back in his direction ever.

Thanks everyone, I have calmed down a bit and am excited about being me again. The fun loving, happy, friendly girl I was before... I am just afraid of the heartache I will go through, if I can get through this period, I will be unstoppable! Im getting me back! :-)

Yup, as dull as it sounds- the best revenge on a narcissist is to ignore and forget! Their whole world view rests on them being important so just delete, block and move on. When he sees you out and about somewhere and you don’t acknowledge him, let alone look longingly at him then you will have your revenge.

i saw a suggestion here, not the same circumstances but it would work, to make a page on the Internet that people can find by searching his name, maybe to warn other potential victims sounds dodgy and probably libellous. Please don’t do this Op!

I know it sounds trite but many of us HAVE been involved with narcs and we know what worked to piss them off while not expending a single iota of mental or physical energy. That’s why its the best bet.

The only thing i could think of is if you have a very close friend who is VERY good with computers. All sorts of low level but extremly annoying mischief could be had.

Best is to ignore. Attention is the oxygen these twat live on.