Sorry for the post in advance... I'm guessing it may trail on a bit.
6 months ago I met a man through a mutual friend. I wasn't looking for anything as I was 8 months out of an abusive relationships.
He was intelligent, well spoken, funny and had the same sarcastic/dry sense of humour as me, he has a child and I have two.
The only initial red flag I could find is that he has had a string of long term relationships, 5 in the past 14 years and not much breathing space between them. Before he met me he was single for a year. He said he made a conscious decision to be in a good place on his own without a relationship as he wasn't happy keep meeting the wrong people as he wanted something that was to last.
6 month's later things are going well overall, met each other's children, met friends and family, however he has still been a little weird over titles, we have had many a talk over it because it seems so strange he can't quite bring himself to call me his girlfriend, even though he says we are together.
Spend all weekends together, mid week night too and he doesnt hide me.
Now this past weekend I ended up finding out from his son that he had had a friends with benefit situation going on the week before our first date (he had originally told me he hadn't been with anyone for 6 weeks Before me). Turns out it was with one of his friends who he is still in contact with now, still texts and sees her occasionally and she is 12 years younger than him at just 23. I was shocked and asked him about it... I was exceptionally calm and just explained I was hurt and disappointed that bit only he lied saying nothing ever happened with her, that he hadn't taken the initiative to fade out the friendship in respect for me. He said he understood I was upset and why and he was stupid for lying about it etc, he offered to sleep on the sofa that night to give me some space (I cried and was upset because my ex cheated on me with his best friend saying it was just platonic), new guy is aware of the abuse and this fact.
In the morning he woke up and seemed exceptionally moody and off, you could cut the tension with a knife, he asked me what I was doing that day and I said I was going to make a move in a bit. He just said well it's fucked now, doesn't know why he did it and then was really quiet and just kept saying it's fucked then stopped talking. So I left, calmly, half expecting him to say he cared for me, not that it was fucked. It left me really confused like he was maybe pleased it was over? Surely this would have just been a disagreement, not the end of our relationship, if he really cared surely he would have told me so not just let me leave knowing I was upset?
This happened yesterday morning and I've heard nothing from him since.
I'm so confused and my triggers are kicking in making me question what I did wrong and have I all along just been strung along