Mother in law possibly being scammed

[catr1na]

So long story short we have just found out MIL has been seeing a man for the past few months and lying about it. She retired last year and has so far given him about 6 grand. Now she has gone away on holiday with him put a deposit on a house in his name and ia coming back to sell hers. We really dont know what to do.

CAB wont be of much use here because she is unlikely to want to listen to anyone. Such scammers as well are highly skilled in manipulating their victims and this person has this lady exactly where he wants her. Elderly and/or divorced women are often targets for such people.

A lonely heart is indeed a vulnerable heart and this is what these scammers prey on. She is one of very many people out there, both men and women, who have been similarly fleeced.

This link may be useful to you catr1na:-

www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/money-legal/scams-fraud/support-for-scam-victims/

Classic scam by the sounds of it unfortunately. Your poor MIL, she will be so embarrassed when this unravels.

My aunt’s SIL was taken in by someone she met over the internet. Scammed her to the tune of about £56k in a year and then disappeared. Even now she still wants to think he might have been genuine. But the family went to the police and the police said that as she’d willingly given him money there was literally nothing they could do.

Show her articles of people who've been scammed with that same story and explain why, while you hope it's all above board, this is why you're worried.

It's clearly a scam, I'd probably be up front with my concerns, even if she doesn't listen as least you've tried your best to warn her. If you say nothing there's no chance at all of getting through to her

Has she got anything wrong with her that could allow you to get financial power of attorney?

If you'd said 'do you think she's fit to look after her own finances?', that would be one thing, but this post makes it sound like you'd be exploiting an illness that doesn't require her to have someone else looking after her finances to be able to control her spending.

She's a grown woman! Yes, it sounds like she's making a huge mistake and it's obviously hard for family to stand by and watch but It's not for OP to abuse the system to take control of her finances under false pretences.

Thank You for all your replies, I think a private investigator is a good idea but they are so expensive. When we try to speak to her about it she just ignores us. It honestly boggles my mind that a seemingly intelligent woman can fall for such an obvious scam. I will keep doing all i can to show her he is not what she seems but i think it may be too late. She rang my partner yesterday from cyprus asking him to transfer the last of her money to another account as she has bought a house.

"She rang my partner yesterday from cyprus asking him to transfer the last of her money to another account as she has bought a house".

And what was his response to that request?. Why couldn't she do this instead of asking her son?.

You cannot help anyone who does not want to be helped or saved. You've tried. Save your energies for your own self. Her own loneliness and wanting to believe that this person is The One for her drives this scam forward as well. It will only cease when the money supply dries up and she is stony broke.

Why don't yous wait outside when you know he's there and when he leaves tell him explicitly you know he's a scamming shitbox and he's never to come near her again.

This is a good article on the subject:-

www.bbb.org/en/us/article/news-releases/17057-online-romance-scams-a-bbb-study-on-how-scammers-use-impersonation-blackmail-and-trickery-to-steal-from-unsuspecting-daters

What did your partner say? Personally I wouldn’t help her at all.

Sorry this is happening to her.

I think this happens a lot more often than one might think - two people in my family have had situations where it hasn’t quite been a scam, but a romantic attachment has led to squandering quite a lot of money.

There was also a case about 10 years ago where a high-flying female professional was duped and utterly controlled by a man claiming to be on the run from the IRA. I would not have believed it, if my husband hadn’t met her at a work event just before it all came out and he said that there was something a bit peculiar about how a man came to collect her at the end of the evening. But of course, no one thought anything of it at the time..,

The problem is that these people are often utterly charming and convincing.

Would a solicitor’s letter put the wind up him?

CAB may well be of use, I work in one have dealt with similar scenario, clearly nothing can stop her if she's determined but sometimes they'll listen more readily to a third party, anything is worth a try
Sometimes being shown evidence of similar if not identical scams by someone impartial can make realisation dawn

Have you tried speaking to Action Fraud? They'll be aware of every trick in the book and may have some useful advice for you.

Sounds awful, but seeing as security is getting better and better on bank accounts and credit cards, it's actually easier for scammers to persuade people to just give them their money.

He went mental and rold her she was a stupid woman and he was not going to help her, and if she was really going to do it then he would not be in her life anymore. I spoke to action fraud and they advised to speak to 101.

Did you speak to 101? If so what was their response?.