Boyfriend is not funny

[Febe123]

Been wth my boyfriend for over a year and we are expecting a baby. I had a strong desire to have a baby.I have sometimes felt like we don't completely click but couldn't put my finger on it. The more time I've spent with him I've become more relaxed with him and we get on ok but we don't have much of a laugh.
He doesn't make many jokes or make fun of people much and I am only funny when I can either bounce off someone or someone who is quieter but finds me funny.
It makes me feel like I have forgotten my own personality and only realise it again when we are occasionally around other people like his family who have a good sense of humour. I feel like a different person when I'm with my family or his family.

It also makes me think the baby might not have a shared sense of humour with me as it will have his dad genes.

If everything else is ok would you accept a relationship which doesn't bring out your humour that much?

I've only met one Alan. He wasn't very funny.

I have no idea if he's called Alan

Cracking jokes and making fun of people isn't my idea of 'funny'.

I can't remember DH ever making me laugh though he makes me smile all the time. Despite the lack of laughter we've stayed together for 30 years, so I'd say laughter isn't necessary for everyone.

Making jokes and making fun of people is your idea of funny, but not everyone's ...

Poor man very understandably thought he was having a child with someone who liked him. But in fact you knew all along you didn't click! Now you're complaining about him not letting you be yourself, as if you are the victim. Have you thought at all about how you have treated him?

You got him into this situation; now what are you going to do? If you do split up, it might be a good idea for him to be the main carer if the other parent is bizarrely already convinced she won't like the baby's sense of humour!

Been with your boyfriend over a year, you're having a baby and just now you've noticed it's not a very good relationship. Well, knock me down with a feather.

This is why adults don't deliberately start families unless they are in a solid, committed relationship. Having a "strong desire to have a baby" is not a good enough reason.

This relationship isn't likely to last. You don't have enough in common. It would have been good to find this out before you TTC.

Why did you decide to have a baby with this man? Lots of people have a desire to have a baby but wait until they have a stable relationship before they do so.

I don’t appreciate laughing at the expense of others either. It easily slides across the line into bullying, kind of like “tickling”.

I don’t understand why his failure to entertain you with a stream of conscious comedy act is preventing you from being you.

Your personal happiness needs to come from within yourself.

If you are expecting someone to make you happy you are going to go through a lot of baby daddies. A for Alan. B for Bloke I can’t remember his name. C for that Cyclist. D for Dick- I mean Richard.

Jesus. Poor bloke. 18 years of payments and seeing his kid EOW. Plenty to laugh about there. Hopefully you have the excuse of being 17 or something.

You seem very immature and need to grow up.

I would be glad to be with someone who doesn't make fun of other people or tell jokes.

There's a lot more to humour than that.

I also find it incredible that you are saying that about your baby.

Maybe your DP has other good qualities you could focus on.

Or do you like being the star of the show?

I think he'd be better off without you.

My Dsis married a man who made her laugh. The only issue was that he also had affairs and was rather lazy. So making me laugh wouldn’t be my top proirity. My Dh can be rather serious, he had a lot of responsiblis from an early age so takes life seriously. But he’s the kindest person I know, works extremely hard and wants to provide for and protect his family. I live him to bits and when hes relaxed he can be very funny.

Is your partner stressed about the baby? What good points does he have?

Humour in a relationship is important to me. I don't want to be laughing like a maniac all the time, but "getting" each other's humour is important, I think.

Maybe you should have decided that you don’t really click with your boyfriend before rushing into what’s effectively a life long commitment with him. Poor bloke.

I agree that humour is very important and my dp makes me laugh a lot. I love that about him. But I think SOH is something that you can work out quite quickly - like on the first date - so I'm surprised the OP has only clicked that her DP doesn't share her SOH. 18 months and one pregnancy in.

Oh dear, yes ideally you would have worked out whether you're compatible or not before having a child together but it's a bit late for that now.

I do agree that a SOH is important, my ex bf told me I wasn't funny but then he said the funniest film he'd seen was White Chicks so that explained that really.

My boyfriend now is very funny, we find similar things funny and we have a good laugh together, I've really missed having that.

This is why adults don't deliberately start families unless they are in a solid, committed relationship. Having a "strong desire to have a baby" is not a good enough reason.

This.