How do you split?

[Changingmynameforadvice1]

Me and my partner are at crisis point in our relationship and i think the reason i dont want to split is because i am scared, scared of how we get through it, scared of being a single mum, scared of struggling etc
We have two dc (2&4years) we own our house jointly but not married.

I would get money from the house sale but as i work part time i doubt i could afford a mortgage on my own, would i het any benefits if i had a mortgage? Who leaves the house and what happens if neither party leave?
I know it would be the best option as we dont get on anymore but im afraid to take the steps forward.
He pays all the bills currently as i work part time and cant afford them due to other outgoings, childcare etc so if we split should i be contributing to the bills whilst still living here?
Im so confused

Anyone?

Hi OP I can't help you as I'm unsure but I just wanted to say sorry for what you're going through. I'm also posting in the hope someone sees the boost and can help xx

Do you own the house jointly? Assuming you do then it'd have to be sold and you could use the money for a deposit for somewhere else if you could work more and get a mortgage or to rent somewhere temporarily.

Can you call citizens advice for some more detailed legal advice? How would he react to the split; how reasonable is he likely to be?

Yes we own jointly and no he won’t be reasonable even though I trhink the split will be the best option for both of us. He is barely speaking to me tonight and it’s just a reminder of how we don’t work anymore. I want out but just scared!

I could give cit advice a call.

I can’t work anymore due to childcare costs sadly!
Would I get housing benefit if I have a mortgage (I don’t believe i would but no nothing of how benefits work)

Thanks for your support mumof2

ok re benefits if you have savings you won't get them but if you had a mortgage you would

you would get child tax credits if you earn less than 34k- i get £130 and earn around 32.5

child benefit stays the same

you could ask him to move out and pay the mortgage as his way of paying maintaince (check the calculator)

council tax reduction etc

both names on deeds (both get equity)

you may be entitled to live there until the kids are older

get your ducks in a row prior to the conversation about leaving

If you have a lot of equity in the house (and therefore savings if you sold up and rented) you may not be eligible for benefits....just a consideration. I dont know much beyond that, sorry not to be more help.

As you aren’t married you don’t have the same rights as a married woman.

Therefore you won’t be entitled to stay in the house until the kids are older, nor woukd you be entitled to more equity (presume you are joint tenants in common)?

I can’t comment on benefits, but both parents need appropriate accommodation to house the children. IMO always best to sell the house, cut those financial ties. If you are only working PT - assume you can’t take the mortgage over yourself and pay him the equity.

Going through similar with my OH - we aren't married either and have a child.

Your partner can ask that you sell the house but you don't have to agree. If he wants you to leave and to sell the house, he has to engage a solicitor then take you to court to force the sale. This will cost him a lot of money.

Instead for much less money, you can both go to a solicitors and draw up a settlement agreement, whereby you say that you'll be living in the house for x amount of years and at the end of that term, either the house is sold and split 50/50, or either person can buy the other out at current market value.

You'll need to find all the paperwork from the purchase of your house (all the conveyancing things) and get your property re-valued too.

Got all this info from a solicitor I spoke to a fortnight ago.

Thank you, I’m not worried about staying in the home I think it would be best all round to move on.
We would probably get around £60k each in Equity but with only a pt wage I worry about my finances and being able to get a mortgage on my own.
I wouldn’t have savings really only the Equity, I have savings currently but I’m saving to pay off my credit card so it will be used for that.
I think I need to do some research on how I wold get by and like someone said above, get my ducks in a row prior to having the convo. If it were just me it would be simple but I have to protect the kids from it all.