Possible to move on in 6 weeks from a 10yr marriage?

[Lemoncup]

My husband of 10years left me about 6weeks ago for someone else. Our relationship wasn't the best throughout, I wasn't as attentive as i should have been and he had multiple emotional affairs and was physically abusive. In the last year of our marriage I had our ds, i got postnatal depression and completely lost myself. My husband struggled with the changes too, he would beg for his wife back but I was fighting my own demons. It doesn't surprise that he leapt into the arms of a young pretty 20year old woman.
My question is.... he told me last Monday that he was struggling but that he had to move on, something he's been saying since we broke up. Yesterday he told me that he has now moved on and he's basically in love with his gf and that he didn't love me anymore. It's so quick it has shocked me. He then sent me a message saying that he's overwhelmed by everything to the point where he doesn't know what he's doing. He then carried on to say he feels like hes not living his life and that its totally out of his control and hes just floating along with it. What do you make of that statement? And do you think it's possible to move in weeks?
I should add up until a week ago he was saying he wanted me but couldn't be together and that he loves me and we had something he'll never get again.
I agree that we should have split but I wanted to work on things. He initially did but then changed his mind because he wanted to see where things went with her. It's killing me that he's moved on so fast, its like our 10year relationship never existed.

Sorry it's so long.

I don't have much in the way of advice, but I couldn't read and run. You say you weren't attentive, and it reads like you blame yourself for him going elsewhere. That's NOT your fault. Some men (and women!) just do shitty things, even with the best partner in the world at home. It isn't your fault sweetie.

It'll all end in tears (and not your tears, either). He'll treat her the same as he treated you, poor girl. Just be glad you're out of it.

OP, please look after yourself. Your ExDH is stirring up a vortex of confusion for himself and those around him - please don't allow yourself to be drawn up into it.

If he changes his mind in the future, and it looks like he's worked on himself (through some useful intervention) and you have reason to trust him again - then maybe you might want to try again with him. However, as you report EA and PA in your relationship, I wonder how substantial and significant those change would need to be to be reliable enough for a longterm relationship.

Has either of you initiated proceedings for a separation?

And, yes, some people do move on very quickly. Particularly when, as it this case, it seems that he overlapped your relationship with another one with someone else.

I wish you peace of mind and heart.

I do a bit blame myself. He's very needy, He craves female attention. Apparently his new gf is very attentive but she's young living at home with no commitments other than him.
I can't believe he's moved on so fast, like I said he was whispering sweet nothing in my ear aup until a week a go. I've gone no contact with him starting today and he's not messaged me once where as before he wanted to be 'best friends' and would message me all the time. I suppose it's just more proof that he has moved on. I wish I could move on that fast, I'm still heartbroken.
It baffles me too that they've only known each other for about 4months and that was just through work, 10hrs a week up until the past month then It's been rvery day. They're already planning on moving in together once our marital home has sold.
No neither of us have, I mentioned it and he just says do what you want. I told him he can pay though because I wanted to work on things and he's the one that wanted to separate.

I think you need to bear in mind that the marriage wasn't great...So he probably checked out of the marriage before 6 weeks ago.

It also sounds like he's a bit conflicted about his decision to leave.