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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How to keep longterm relationships alive...

1 reply

PukkaLovetea · 25/06/2018 09:25

I'm married to a really good man. He's a great dad. He's funny and generous and supportive and clever. I adore him in many ways.

I know I should thank my lucky stars, and look to all the good things, but instead I find myself - fourteen years in - restless and frustrated more often than I'd like. I want some spontaneity! I want him to plan some things for us without me nagging. I do all of our life's admin, all the stuff that I want to do, I have to organise.

I have told him about this but nothing changes.

In short, I want...newness. If that makes sense.

I find this desire festers in me, which is partly my personality (I'm pretty driven to do new things, keep moving forward, keep changing things up) and partly the reality of a longterm relationship.

I don't really know what I'm saying, but I suspect I'm not alone.

OP posts:
Disquieted1 · 25/06/2018 13:24

Sounds like you're in a comfortable rut and I understand the need for novelty.

I find it's good to have something exciting on the horizon. Ever danced the Argentine tango in Buenos Aires?
Plan it and do it.

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