How often does your DP/DH get in touch when he is away?

[NormskiNamechange]

I’m just wondering. My DP has gone away this morning for two weeks. Pathetically, I am already missing him.

He won’t be contactable by phone but has promised to keep in touch via email ‘sporadically’.

I know every relationship is different but how often would you expect your partner to keep in touch. I’m only really asking out of curiosity.

Can I ask, what you’re getting out of this relationship?

In four years, you’ve never been on holiday together. What are his excuses and in that time has he been away with other people?

How many times a week do you see each other and have you ever had the ‘moving forward’ talk about the future as after four years I’d be expecting a bit more, but that’s just my opinion.

It doesn't sound a very committed relationship on his side if he doesn't live with you, won't go on holiday with you or help his mother get to like you. How much he rings you is the least of your problems. I'd say that you deserve better.

For a weekend, not at all. for a week maybe once or twice. It’s healthy to give each other a bit of space

When I'm away for work I normally text a few times in the day and call once in the evening - but then my husband works long days from home so I am aware that sometimes I'm the only person he speaks to all day.

Daily or more often by phone or we have 'discovered' whats app.

DH will text me throughout the day, I expect we would exchange 20-40 messages a day.

I would like to go on holiday with him but he has always complained about the price/destination etc. So I now no longer bother even trying to arrange something.

Tbh with you I think I would have a think about the relationship in these 2 weeks. It doesn't sound as if he's really into it

Texts throughout the day and goodnight phone call. Every day. Been together 15 years.

DP travels 21 weekends per year and often inbetween too. We are in contact by WhatsApp multiple times each day, I email him each evening and he calls when he can. This weekend he left Thursday and called last night and this afternoon. So time zones calls are impossible as the brief period we are awake together one of us is working. He also has to be really carefully where he makes calls as his role is high profile and he needs to be careful press can hear him.

Thanks everyone. He has been in touch to say he arrived safely and sent me a few photographs. This is more than he did last time he went away on a ‘lads holiday’ a few years ago when I didn’t get a single message.

The sight of him in a stunning location did make me feel really sad. I think PPs are right, this is about more than a lack of contact.

My DH went away with his mum. I was glad they got time together and supportive. I didn’t get called or texted in the time he was away. She’s since died prematurely and in do glad he’s hot those memories of the 2 of them to look back on plus it bought them closer together until the day she died.

When he’s away with work we talk at least once a day, usually message too.

Every day, especially nowadays it's so much easier and cheaper to make contact. How on earth does he only have a work phone? I know work phones are allowed a bit of personal use but to use it entirely as work and personal I'd quickly get caught out with its usage!

DH works away most weeks - he usually phones every evening, even if it’s just a quick ‘everything ok’

I too don’t think being in a relationship with someone who doesn’t want to go on holiday with you can be that good a relationship. Think how nice it would be going on a fun holiday with someone who loves you!! I love holidays with my dh, you should find someone you can do that with. Does he love you? How can you tell? I doubt it...

depends where he is. He is sometimes in rural locations where WiFi is non existent so we can't speak, but if he had WiFi or phone signal he will text every day and call every evening.
I miss him when he goes away but I'm used to it and the DC keep me busy.

most phone contracts now have roaming beyond the eu inclined in the contract and in the eu there are no extra charges. So don’t know why his phoned would be barred.

I do think there are some much bigger issues here.

My work phone has roaming barred.

I feel sad for you op. You clearly aren't getting what you want from this relationship. No holidays, no contact while he goes on holidays without you, mother isn't nice to you. Is he usually so unconcerned with your happiness?

To answer your question my dp contacts me every day while away for work trips. He messages and calls. He's taken me with him before too if it's a particularly nice destination.

It sounds more like a relationship of convenience, you're there when he wants you but you can easily be forgotten when he doesn't. Even if you've never had a holiday together, have you not even had a weekend away here and there?

I would have a good long think over the next couple of weeks about what you're really getting out of this relationship. I think you deserve better.

When my DH works away he texts, Skypes and emails as well!

Well he is back on Saturday. I’ve actually had a lovely few days. I found the first few days very hard but I’m not missing him anymore.

He has messaged me multiple times daily and I think he is looking forward to seeing me. My self confidence has improved immensely since he was away.

We are going to have a serious talk when he gets back. In the meantime, I’ve booked a trip away with my friend to Mexico in September.