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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

23 years married, and I have finally left

4 replies

Lcar · 18/06/2018 09:48

After quite a few false starts over the last 6 months and 23 years of marriage (and quite a lot of emotional abuse), I’ve finally left my husband.
The children and I moved into a little rented cottage last week.
I’ve been on anti-depressants since May.
I’m running on adrenaline and keeping busy at the moment and avoiding ‘feeling’ by concentrating on ‘doing’, but it all feels a bit odd and scary.
And stupidly I miss him :(
My older children are home from university for the summer, and are very supportive.
I’ve caught up with a couple of old friends, who are caring and concerned.
He says he won’t (can’t afford) to give me any maintenance, called me a ‘money-grabbing bitch’ when I mentioned it, and told our 15 year old son that he would not give me a penny but would give the kids some cash for clothes when he can afford it.
He’s being reasonable about sharing out belongings, though we aren’t really speaking.
And I’m trying to keep things normal at work.
I hope I can keep all the balls in the air...

OP posts:
WasFatNowThin · 18/06/2018 09:52

Well done for leaving!

I'd get legal advice about the maintenance though.

housewifeoflittleitaly · 18/06/2018 10:05

Well done, it’s tough going. Your doing great, allow yourself time to process things.

fuzzywuzzy · 18/06/2018 11:20

Apply for child maintenance thro CMS. He can try telling them he doesn’t want to financially support his children.

kocerhan3 · 18/06/2018 11:27

You're the op of the post back from November 2017! I posted today on that to say how reading through your thread made me cry. You're stronger than you realise, you're a grounded, brave and smart woman from what I read, and you deserve all the happiness that's coming to you - despite whether you can see it yet or not. Have you started training for that marathon yet?Thanks

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