Groped in my sleep

[Takinglibertieswhileslerping]

Nc for this but long term poster.

For some reason today I was reminded of something my stbexh did when we were still together (we've been separated over 5 years now).

He once told me laughingly how he would "help himself" and feel my breasts when I was asleep. This happened a few times apparently.

We didn't have sex very often (about once every 2-3 weeks) because I had severe gynae problems which resulted in severe pain that lasted into the next day if I had sex, problems with my parent's health which meant my mind was elsewhere and basically he was horrible to me (I now realise he was emotionally abusive) so I didn't fancy him. I would only agree to sex if I was drunk (which was very rare) or more usually just to get him off my back for a week or so because I couldn't stand his whining any more.

I remember at the time being horrified and him finding it funny.

I know this wasn't ok and I have much better boundaries about sex now but can only control what goes on when awake although am single at the moment. It's just left me feeling quite sick and I don't know why I was reminded of it today but it's left me feeling repulsed and upset.

It is a completely unacceptable thing to do, he treated your body as his to paw without your permission or knowledge. If you haven't already had counselling, you probably need to see a counsellor to talk through and deal with your feelings. It really would help you.

If he did it while you were asleep then you didn't consent, and you are upset and repulsed because you were sexually assaulted and even if you have managed to put it aside until today, your mind itself hasn't , that's why you still feel upset about it...

What he did was a crime, you didn't consent

Im sorry.

Its horrible behaviour; he sexually assaulted you when you were sleeping.

He was such a horrible man. So glad to not be with him anymore. Feel sorry for his new girlfriend as am sure he'll probably behave in a similar way with her. She seems to think he's god's gift though so maybe she gives him enough sexual attention for him not to have to help himself whilst she sleeps.