Social media & affairs

[Annabelle4]

Just a thought/observation(s)....

From reading threads on here and real life experience....

Do you think that social media has allowed more cheating to happen, or created a greater opportunity for it to happen, e.g. Attached Man/woman can 'like' someone's picture and spark affair, or did affairs happen anyway, and just as often? But without social media, how did the person having the affair keep in contact with the OW/OM?

Pros: the partner of the cheater can check social media and has evidence, maybe otherwise would not have discovered affair?

Any thoughts?

I remember reading that a huge number of affairs were sparked by friends reunited back in the day!

I’m sure it’s easier than ever to have an affair these days, gone are the days of having to meet someone in person to get your rocks off. Having never come across it in rl I’m amazed by the number of ways people talk about affairs forming on here. I’ve never been in Instagram for example but people seem to meet through that, people meet through twitter and get married, it’s easier to connect with hundreds of people about very niche interests in all sorts of digital places.

As you say, there’s also always a trail now so people are maybe more likely to get caught too.

I’m trying to imagine brief encounter if she’d googled him when she got home and found his Facebook profile. They’d have stayed in touch easier but he’d have seen pictures of her husband on there.

My ex used email; in the olden days people phoned, or sent letters. Before that was possible they just met up every Thursday when husband/wife was out. Try watching some old black and white movies from all the way back in 2004 and you'll be amazed.

I'm not on much social media, but the possibilites for affairs seem endless! I suppose it's the same in RL really, chance encounters, sudden closeness with colleagues, meeting colleagues or friends partners and a 'spark' igniting..... I wonder what the ratio is for affairs started on social media versus real life?

I think the thrill of getting a message from him/her plays a role - the "ping" and the sight of his/her name.

Also, many people find it easier to set out feelings in writing and might write things they'd never have had the confidence to articulate face-to-face or on the 'phone back in the day.

Seeing photographs of old boyfriends/girlfriends can be quite emotional especially if they've aged well.

Some people don't regard emotional online affairs as affairs. "We are just friends", they say...but they wouldn't want their spouses to read the messages, with all the comfortable banter, 'sharing' and the pet names etc.

' I wonder what the ratio is for affairs started on social media versus real life?'

Exactly, Ryder63

I think it's made it easier for people to get caught, TBH.

Back in the 80s you didn't have itemised phone bills, GPS trackers, mobile phones, emails. So you contacted your affair partner face to face (usually at work) and arranged your next assignation. Or you went out to "walk the dog" or "play golf" and just dropped round there unannounced (or rang from a phone box beforehand.)

So yeah thinking about it, social media facilitates more conversation and interaction between an affair couple than there was back in the day. And that in itself can lead to emotional connection that might not be present if it was just a case of "see you down the pub on Friday night as usual and we'll have a shag in my car".

You're far, far more likely to get discovered just by the sheer weight of communication.

Good points, NotTheFordType. Relationship posts prove how easy it is for affairs to be discovered via SM and tech in general.

I think the mobile phone & social media have made it easy as anything.

Back in the day, with one landline, normally in the lounge, it would have been far more difficult & you’d have to have connected in real life to start with.

These days, it’s almost like a beauty parade of men & women alike, eager to just have sex, with no consequences, putting themselves out there.

I think you’re right OP. It’s never been easier

I guess it's easy to delete internet history, but not easy to delete phone bills or bank statements. Btw you sound like a journalist.

A journalist?!
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