Splitting up, moving out, how does it all work?

[ihavetogoshoppingnow]

After months if not years of trying to make my relationship work for the sake of my family I’ve finally reached breaking point and told my OH I’m not in love with him anymore and that I want us to split. We have 2DC and own a house together, he is devistated though he understands and knows that our relationship has been awful for months. we both just want to make it as easy as possible on each other and the kids. The plan is to sell our house and then each buy our own but we have no idea what to do till it sells, neither of us has anywhere else to go. if he moved out and rented I couldn’t afford the bills on my own and he couldn’t afford to pay his bills and half of our houses but we can’t keep living like this it’s killing us being in the same house.

Assuming he works, I'd suggest he ask around at work to see if anyone can offer him a spare room for a few months, for a nominal fee.

Or have a look on spareroom.co.uk. Depending on area he could potentially get somewhere with all bills included for £50/week.

You may have to suck it up and carry on in the same household while you are selling the house: maybe have an arrangement where he stays with a friend a couple of nights a week and you do the same on different nights so you get a break from each other.

FWIW XDH and I carried on in the same home for 14 months. It was an acrimonious divorce so it was a very very difficult situation but it was short term pain for long term gain.

If you both get on OK you could live in the same house (perhaps one of you sleep in the living room?) take that time to sell the house, split possessions, sort out finances etc. You need clear rules though - especially regarding new partners.

Or look into renting a nearby one bedroom flat and maybe share it - each spending half a week there with the the kids having a solid base.