I’m 38 weeks pregnant and am at home alone looking after DC. H runs his own business. A few days ago he went away on a work trip which I thought was unnecessary, although he deemed was necessary. I worried/suspected/gut feeling it was a glorified stag party (without any reason to celebrate) with a few bits of work to do inbetween.
He’s been ok and keeping in contact but two of his single friends suddenly turned up 48 hours ago and he’s been out in bars with them every night til 5am. Apparently they both have reasons to be there (this is semi believeable as they all work in the same area.)
Then today he has texted me that friend 3 has shown up “out of the blue.” Friend 3 is married but constantly cheats on his wife, goes to strip clubs and is generally not a particularly moral person and H knows from past conversations that I am not comfortable with him going out with him.
It’s obvious to me what this is now. And it’s obvious that it was all planned and he deliberately didn’t tell me.
The more I say that I am not comfortable I know the more he will accuse me of being insecure and trying to control his time. The more angry I get about it all, the more he will be able to successfully label me as controlling and aggressive.
I do feel insecure and I would like him to care about my feelings but I just can’t, at this point in pregnancy, have that feeling of checking my phone all night or wondering what they’re up to or waiting for him to be in touch. Or in fact, accepting this all as a coincidence like he is trying to pass it off as. I’d rather take back control and just block him until he comes home.
Only problem is I am not sure if that’s the right thing to do. He likes to speak daily to the kids and he absolutely believes he is doing nothing wrong.
I don’t know what to say to him or do which makes me not come across as angry or aggressive and controlling but also means I feel that I am taking action for myself rather than sitting here in late pregnancy with the DC like a muppet doormat.
Any ideas?