Co dependent

[Whatiwishfor]

Last 18 months have been a total nightmare. Husband left and its become very apparent how emotionally and financially abusive he is. I have received legal aid which has been amazing as hes taking me to court 4 times over the last 8 months regarding contact with our young children (not a good result for him any of the times). There has been a problem every week since and i have had to have a huge amount of legal and emotional advise from my solicitor, friends and family.
Its become very apparent to me how overly emotionally attached i was to him. Im not in love with him any more and realise what a nasty person he is but i still think about him constantly. I except i haven't had much chance to detach due to how much he sees the children and how much he imposes himself into my life. But if i was honest im still struggling hes still in my head.
I function well but my heads like a washing machine going around and around. I really carnt afford counselling atm as im trying to buy him out of the house. Any advise

Sound bad! I can understand why you are worried about your DC. Is it likely that the GF has a good influence on him re ourbursts etc? Perhaps she is a blessing in disguise?

I was hoping she would be. But tbh his behaviour has become a lot lot worse since he met her. They met and moved in pretty instantly, she is always there and must must know his behaviour towards me and the children is very volatile. I think she enables his bed behaviour and im pretty sure that he would be more work able if he wasn with her. Its a real shame as she could have been a real asset in it all, but thats not the case.
She was there when he drove of with the children's toys and then sent a solicitors letter saying me and my mother were abusive towards them,..... i was at work! They have both sat on my wall mocking me and intimidating my mum. She is part of the problem. I really dont understand as shes a shrink herself, and has children. The whole things very very odd.

The GF is a psychologist? Poor you!

I'm sure you are aware of just how little power you have in this situation, it really suck. All you can do is be a good example to your DC by behaving with dignity (and I think you already are) and support them if they are unhappy with their dad.