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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Don't know how to talk to husband about his work stress

0 replies

Tmtiger · 05/06/2018 20:53

He's had a situation at work which has been stressing him out for months due to one childish colleague who ruled the roost with his moods.

Now this colleague has left. Putting my husband in a much stronger position at work. He's top of the sales board at work. He now gets to hire someone of his own choosing to replace the child man.

But he's still coming home every night saying work was rubbish. It affects every element of his behaviour in the evening. Not chatty just grumpy irritated with me for what ever I say and do and it makes things miserable.

Whenever I try to speak to him about it he just gets defensive and says he's done nothing wrong. I'm not saying he has done anything wrong but I just don't think living your life this way is good for anyone (particularly when things are in the bigger picture going well)

What I want to say is that while he is intelligent. He isn't emotionally intelligent and doesn't have any mechanism to recognise and deal with stress in a way which doesn't impact the family home every evening and that he would benefit from changing things in some way so that in his own way he accepts life at work isn't under his control and when things don't go his way he is able to accept it and move on and not carry around with it all evening and that if he could learn how to do it. He and us would benefit hugely and we could enjoy our life alot of the time rather than waiting for the weekend to enjoy our lives.

Because ultimately I know he is a fun interesting kind person who I chose to marry but I want to see that side of him more than 1 or 2 nights a week.

This is what I want to say. But when ever I approach it I don't get to say any of this as it turns into a row about anything and everything.

Any advice?

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