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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Husband is so insensitive!

4 replies

Ajg2393 · 05/06/2018 09:11

I have recently lost my mum, which was sudden and a shock. My brother and I have been dealing with all the funeral arrangements, probate, chattels etc etc. It has been a very emotional time. My husband hasn’t been as supportive as I would want. Last night for example he’d had enough of what I wanted to talk about and just held his hand up to dismiss me. Anyway this morning he apologised for upsetting me and hoped I would forgive him. I said I had no choice, he replied that I do have a choice if I wanted to go down that route. What does that mean? I don’t have anyone to talk to, so thought this group might be a good shoulder to cry on.

OP posts:
Ajg2393 · 05/06/2018 09:14

My natural way of dealing with him now is to shut him out and not talk to him about my day/ life as he doesn’t listen anyway. This approach generally ends up with me feeling resentment and he hasn’t even noticed.

OP posts:
lifebegins50 · 05/06/2018 09:24

I am so sorry for your loss and I can see why you felt hurt.

You have a choice to forgive him but I think you need reassurance that he will learn from it.No point him apologising unless he tries to be more sensitive in future.

Is he generally unkind to you?

Ajg2393 · 05/06/2018 09:40

I wouldn’t say unkind, just not kind. He’s not very sensitive and can be quite selfish. I don’t think he’ll change. We’ve been married for 13 years.

OP posts:
Hont1986 · 05/06/2018 09:57

It doesn't sound like either of you are communicating very well, have you considered some sort of counselling?

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