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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feel stuck and run down, need advice on relationship

7 replies

CraftyGirly90 · 03/06/2018 16:02

I've been with my OH about 6 years now, living together for most of it but things aren't the same anymore. He never talks to me about big issues like kids, marriage etc, never helps with h/w unless I nag him 1000 tines, he rationalises it when the cat pees on the bed and then leaves the peed on duvet for days before cleaning it, he talks over my TV shows but complains when I do the same to his, he leaves the cat litters and bowls for days when dirty, leaves dishes in the sink for days, leaves simple chores for days so I have to do them on top of work, is more bothered about buying films than saving money, leaves the rubbish for days, never notices when I blitz the flat, leaves the laundry cause I 'don't trust him to do it', he uses my intimate sponge to clean the peed on duvet and shuts down when I try to talk to him about things and assumes something is wrong when I get annoyed. I need advice on what to do

OP posts:
BillywigSting · 03/06/2018 16:22

Ltb.

He has zero respect for you.

What exactly are you getting out of this?

AttilaTheMeerkat · 03/06/2018 16:25

Why are you with this man at all, why do you value your own self so poorly here that you seem nothing more than a maid to this person?. You do not want another six minutes let alone another six years of this.

CraftyGirly90 · 03/06/2018 16:35

Atilla it was good originally. He made me smile laugh etc but it slowly stopped. Its not that I don't value myself its more that no one has ever wanted me before him so its sort of knocked my self esteem over the years. I just don't want to hurt him unnecessarily

OP posts:
AlReef · 03/06/2018 16:37

If he's like this without having children, can you only imagine what he'd be like when they come along? Ditch him now before it's too late!

CraftyGirly90 · 03/06/2018 16:42

AlReef children coming along naturally, even by accident, isnt a possibility. Hence why I want to talk about other options but he just shuts down. I want to but the idea of starting again from scratch is scary to me (especially at my age)

OP posts:
D0gswithj0bz · 04/06/2018 09:40

I don't see anything positive about this relationship. Are you scared of being on your own ? Why not separate, live on your own and find things to do that make you happy

CraftyGirly90 · 06/06/2018 20:24

D0gs I'm not scared of being on my own, that doesn't bother me at all. Its just difficult, cause of cost of somewhere new etc. I don't want to hurt him unnecessarily as well which I know is ridiculous

OP posts:
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